Please forgive my disarray. I’m a bit shaken.
Death knocked on my door today.
I told him/her I was not home.
As I looked through the peephole, I could not see a face, but it’s shrugged shoulders and turned up hands, told me of my faux pas and I retorted, “This is a recording.”
It did not seem to work as a boney finger covered the peephole, so I further retorted with static in my voice, “That was a recording.”
I peeked through the blinds and saw a shadowy figure turning and walking away. My first thought was good news.
Bad News, (I hate those scenarios)
It’s sickle got caught in my grout.
He/she pulled on the sickle trying to free it and the blade broke off.
I was petrified as I stood watching Death with a Stick!
I was sure my home owners insurance didn’t cover such things, but I called them anyway. Allstate said it was out of their hands.
Now I’m left waiting for death…not for extinction…a lawsuit.
The Wholly Book of Doo-Doo-Rot-on-Me is adult satirical humor featuring adult language and adult content, and the work is a parody of the Old Testament Book of Deuteronomy.
Ron