I sought further meaning with The Devil’s Dictionary, however it seems when the book was written, the word was not.

Professor Ambrose Penwose, Kiwi
Ist Amendment to Crash Dummy Course

The dictionary defines Crash as;
1. to make a loud, clattering noise, as of something dashed to pieces.
2. to break or fall to pieces with noise.
3. (of moving vehicles, objects, etc.) to collide, especially violently and noisily.
4. Aeronautics. to land in an abnormal manner, usually causing severe damage.

I sought further meaning with The Devil’s Dictionary, however it seems when the book was written, the word was not.

There were a few collisions here and there to speak of, regarded as “wrecks”, between wagons, carriages, bicycles, and other forms of transportation, but the term “Crash,” was not introduced until sometime before Henry Ford put all of his finances into automobile stock.
The crash that followed dealt the world a pivotal blow, however that crash was short lived compared to the one classified previously between two colliding vehicles…The Automobile Crash.

That Crash seems to have endured in the hearts of mild mannered men who sit behind the wheel of an automobile and metamorphize into lunatics.
Their vehicles were found to be ideal places to do everything other than driving. Wrecks became numerous and violent. A new word was needed to describe the carnage.
Thus CRASH came into being, and driving has never been the same.

Women got into the equation when they found driving an automobile an ideal place for putting on makeup, among other things, in privacy. Crashes tended to ruin their mascara, but obviously not enough to alter the procedure.

The invention of the telephone provided reliable communication between individuals miles apart and the auto industry was quick to jump on the band wagon, however automobile use required long cords that the average driver could not afford, and those that could found them tangling around trees and strangling pedestrians.

Speaking of pedestrians…the term was also unheard of before the coming of the automobile. Those traveling afoot were known as “walkers.” or “Horse Poop Dodgers,” hence the name of the baseball team from Brooklyn that ultimately moved to Los Angeles.

Along came the cordless phone. Now folks could talk all the time, all over town. Crashes took on a new meaning. Not only were the vehicles shattered, but the calls became sudden screaming hang-ups.

Apparently women and men find it more important to call their mothers and say, “What are ya doing?” than providing safety for those in and around their vehicles.

The beat goes on!
Crash Dummies are a necessary commodity.

This piece is written as an enticement to enroll in the class, which presently notes nobody.
Please remember, in order for me to get credit for teaching the class, someone must get credit for attending it.

Penwose Out,
By George
NoPo8