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  Home > Humor > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry      Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

By George xx xx

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Why does everything happen to me?

OMG!
Why does everything happen to me?
I just got a message from Ebay. I’m thinking it cannot be good. It never is.

Have you heard about the Amazon Prime cargo plane that crashed on the way to Houston? I was thinking I was all right because the movie I ordered from Ebay was in England and not shipped yet. I assume they do not literally mean “Shipped?”
Then I got a message from Ebay saying the package was shipped, (By plane) and had gone through customs in the United States.

Whoa is me! The plane that crashed was from Miami. My movie could be on it. Do you think Amazon flies Ebay stuff?

I have already lost one movie when something else crashed previously. Or it was stolen in transit. Regardless I never got it. They sent me a refund and I reordered. Now it seems it is lost as well? Maybe the Black Box from the plane knows where it is? I understand they cannot find it either. From what I have seen on news videos of the crash it will probably be dirty anyway, so I’ll just reorder the reorder.

The witch who lives down the street says that something evil will happen to me if I watch the movie. I find it hard to believe that the Good Forces protecting me are causing planes to crash.

I suppose I should open the Ebay email?

It’s just an update saying everything is fine and I should receive it soon…Nevermind!

Penwose Out,
By George
NoPo8


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Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on February 27, 2019
Woe is me! I live in Houston and that Amazon plane crashed a mere 80 miles east of me! I didn't order an evil movie, but I have written and spoken out about how Amazon is taking over everything in a very monopolistic way so that anyone that publishes on AD is forced to place their stuff on Amazon or get no sales whatsoever.

But they probably will forgo the plane and just deliver via drone a bomb in a package to show their new stage of my criticism of their business practices. Nevermind.

Bye, George,

Ron

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