What else can you call it?

I am reminded of a letter I just received from what I like to refer to as, The Nut House, although Dr. Swigmon Fwad, finds the term offensive and inappropriate, until I remind him that is where my Xwife is in captivity, to which he replies, “Quite appropriate!”

This time they were telling me that she feared she was going bald and purchased one of those Laser Caps to wear on her head and invigorate her follicles.
She caught her hair on fire. Now she is bald.

She also burned up most of the padding on her walls. They are afraid she will injure herself further by banging her bald head on the steel walls.
I told them if it makes her happy let her bang away and be glad the walls are steel. I had to practically build a new house.
I told them if they were really worried for her safety they should hook the walls up to a good car battery and let her get shocked a few times.
They told me, “Shocking her doesn’t seem to help.”

They keep asking me If I’d come over and help her get back on her bicycle. I keep politely refusing.

It seems they are “self-electrified.”…that is they are not plugged into the Electric Grid. Instead they supply their own electricity by having their patients ride “generating bikes.” Most of them are very slow and barely turn the lights on, but my Xwife charges up all the batteries.
When she rides she thinks she’s escaping.

Maybe someday she will? It will be a dark day for The Nut House.

Penwose Out,
By George
NoPo8