I'm serious

LIFE IS CRUMMY!
I’m serious.

Where do crumbs come from?
That is almost poetic, but it’s not, because I am not a poet, (NoPo8)

If crumbs were gold I would be rich without leaving my house.
Miners with wheelbarrows would be knocking on my door.

They are all over the place. I dust, I clean, I vacuum, I mop…my house is clean for a day.

I don’t even eat much, (even though I’m gaining weight,) but the place is full of crumbs. If I walk around in my bare feet, I get crumbs between my toes.

I don’t eat with my mouth open. Am I a sloppy eater?…Obviously.

I eat bagels for breakfast at the computer. My chair is full of crumbs all the nooks and crannies. How did they even get in there? I just replaced my old chair. It’s full of crumbs. When I put it out on the curb for pickup, neighborhood birds can feed off of it for a week, even longer if they share and don’t pigout…fat chance for that.

Usually I eat lunch and dinner while watching the tele. The couch is full of crumbs. The floor behind the couch is full of crumbs. How do they get back there? You would think the bugs would eat them, but I don’t have bugs.

Life is full of crummy situations. I have a new phone coming. Tracking says it will be delivered today, between 11 and One. At 10, an unidentified anonymous undercover white van pulled up sort of in front of my house.

“It’s early!” I thought as I peeked out through the blinds. He must have been talking on his phone cause he did nothing for about 5 minutes. Finally I heard a door open/close, and he walked around toward my house. I was overcome with anxiety.

But, he opened the sliding door. He leaned in and started arranging his next orders. That truck must have been full cause he was in there a long time. I kept looking through the blinds. I knew that as soon as I looked away he’d do something and I’d loose track of him.

He finally came out with a package.

“That looks like the perfect size for a cell phone!”

He went to my neighbor’s house.

“Bummer!…He could have more?”

He got in the van and drove off.

Now that was CRUMMY!

When I get my new phone, I’m going to set it up for a selfie video, on a tripod, and record myself eating and see how many crumbs fall?

Who would like to see the video?

Penwose Out,
By George
NoPo8