Don't tell them I told you

Professor Ambrose Penwose, Kiwi

Due to my better than above average level of intelligence as well as historical, mathematical, scientifical, and psychological magnificence, NASA contacted me regarding the Mars Rover.

What I am about to tell you is highly classified. I am allowed to tell no one. So if you are contacted by NASA, don’t tell them I told you.
They did say I could tell my wife, but I don’t see that as a justifiable reason to get married.

As you may have heard, or not? We have landed on Mars. We are roving Mars with a remote control unit known as The Mars Rover, which sends back movies in color of “Things” it sees.

NASA has asked me to clarify a few things they do not understand.
They sent me a feed, which I locked into directly to the Rover.
The first item on their list had them completely baffled until I identified it.
“That is a Rock.”
I could almost hear them applauding.

I asked them If I could control the Rover.
They said, “NO.”
“How bout if I tell you where to go and You send commands?”
“That would work.”

I watched on the feed as The Rover roved over Mars. It seemed rather dusty. I saw something in the distance, “What’s that in the distance?”
“We see nothing?”
“Over to the left, tell the Rover to turn to the left.”
“Earth to Rover…Turn to the Left.”

“That’s better, do you see it now?”
“We see something, but cannot identify. Can you identify?”
“No, we need to move closer.”
“Earth to Rover…Move closer.”

“That’s better…OMG!”
“What is it Penwose?”
“It looks like…A Candy Bar Factory!”

Penwose Out,
By George
NoPo8