It takes two to survive a marriage
by Jan Richards

Courtship is one thing, marriage is another. When you find the love of your life, courting begins and usually ends in marriage. If you work at it, the courtship in your marriage will remain.

Marriage is not a playground where one enjoys fun for the rest of their lives. It’s mountains to climb, cloudy days to endure, and in between, happy moments.

It’s going without material things to put money away to buy the house, with the little picket white fence. It’s using coupons and buying the cheaper brand or buying in bulk when a sale arises.

It’s stretching paychecks to pay utility bills, car payments, rent, etc. And finding loose change to rent a movie. It’s reading books, new s papers, and magazines, instead of dancing and going out to eat. It’s having TV dinners once in a while and Hamburger Helper to stretch a meal.

It’s having to get up on snowy mornings and go to work when you rather sleep. It’s listening to a boss as he hands you work he wanted yesterday. It’s being spoken to in a rude manner when you make a mistake or when your work is late. It’s working overtime when you’d rather be home with your mate. It’s looking for a raise that comes in nickels and dimes.

It’s having a child and worrying about measles, mumps, chicken pox, and other childhood diseases. It’s sitting up at night when a child is sick. It’s taking a child to early morning hockey practice, cub scouts, brownies, boy scouts, girl scouts, baseball games, etc. It’s making cakes and cookies for PTA and meetings.

It’s comforting a child when they didn’t make the team. Wiping tea r s from eyes. It’s telling them they did their best. It’s talking to a child about drugs and hoping they don’t join the wrong crowd and try them. It’s knowing what to say to a child who has tried drugs. It’s taking pride in things your child does. It’s being there for them when they need you.

Marriage is watching a child grow into adulthood, showing them the right avenues to take. Hoping they make the right decisions after graduation. Taking them to different colleges, helping them to settle in.

It’s walking down the aisle when a daughter gets married and crying tea r s of joy. It’s seeing grandchildren and watching them grow. It’s g rowing old together.

It’s arguments, disagreements, dealing with situations, forgiving, saying you’re sorry, giving someone a second chance. Listening, sharing, comforting, consoling.

It’s doing something you don’t like just because your spouse does. It’s buying a gift and not because it’s a special occasion. It’s little notes in lunch bags, a phone call to say I love you. Movies, dinners, nights out together.

It’s enjoying retirement and taking ca re of each other, as you grow old. It’s living life all over again through an older body.

Marriage has it moments of tears and anger. Like bad tasting medicine, it takes time for the taste to disappear and so does the hurt and anger of harsh spoken words.

Marriage is a sacrament where two lovers joined at the alter became one, where they vowed to love, honor, and respect one another.

Nobody said marriage was going to be easy. Like an old house, it needs repairs. When you feel like throwing in the towel, take a walk, calm down, or try to work it out. Once you close the door to marriage, you may never be able to open it again, and all life will hold is emptiness.