I'd think, “I wish he wouldn't say that,” and reply, “Please don't write out of guilt.” It made no difference. I did not take it personally. He'd shared over the years that he felt guilty about a lot of things. I felt sorry for him. Then one day it hit me “I'm just like him. Maybe even worse.” I now remind myself often, “If you spot it you got it!” I realized if I dislike a trait in someone else I usually have it too.

An experience with two dentist highlighted the destructive power of guilt. My regular dentist always fussed at me for not flossing and getting my teeth cleaned regularly. “You're going to get gum disease. You have problems already,” he'd scold. I'd leave his office guilt ridden and think, “What's the use.”

Later I saw a different dentist. He looked into my mouth and exclaimed, “You have healthy gums. Do you exercise?”

“I jog daily,” I said proudly. His compliment inspired me to start flossing regularly and take better care of my teeth. My experience showed me guilt seldom works. .

Once I discovered my guilt I saw it everywhere. I prefer being outdoors to indoors but do my womanly homemaker chores because that's what women do. If I'm honest with myself it's out of guilt.

Misery loves company. Those of us who are guilt-ridden are generous in sharing it. My family and I perfected the art of guilt tripping. For many years I continued the legacy.

Few of us stop doing something because we feel guilt. I'm in awe of people who refuse to stay guilty.

I once believed that guilt somehow made a difference in outcomes. I felt it was my responsibility to feel guilt.

Later I discovered I'd felt guilty for so long the habit was difficult to break. My guilt wasted time and energy and bore little fruit. When I asked, “How can I change the situation?” and acted on the solution guilt stopped wrecking my health, energy and self esteem.

Some people say we would all be criminals if we had no guilt. In reality those who are destructive carry guilt and shame but it's usually unconscious. When Jesus said on His deathbed, “Father forgive them for they know not what they do” he did not mean all criminals should not experience consequences. What we can release is bitterness, hatred, guilt and the need for vengeance. His message is clear, “Judge not lest you be judged, he without sin cast the first stone, bless them that curse you.” We are all God's children.

The real message of Christ's life and teaching is not his His crucifixion but His resurrection. Love cannot kill to save. God's Son cannot be crucified. Crucifixion is always the ego's aim. The resurrection is a release from guilt by guiltlessness.

“A Course in Miracles” says the ego is the choice for guilt. “He who would not forgive must judge, for he must justify his failure to forgive. The Holy Spirit is the choice for guiltlessness.” The Course asks, “Do you judge others fit for crucifixion or redemption?” Pray not to be forgiven but how to forgive. No relationship can rest on guilt as real relationships are Holy. Guilt is always in the mind that has condemned itself. Give no reality to guilt and see no reason for it. Salvation is an escape from guilt.

“A Course in Miracles" says we have a choice between two "worlds," the physical, in time, and the spiritual, in eternity. One looks at the world through ego the other through spirit. One is external the other internal. Since God is all love all knowing and all powerful the concept of separation is an illusion. When we judge another we judge God and ourselves. Forgiveness is a release of guilt, for love and guilt cannot coexist. There is no fear in love for love is guiltless. There is no guilt in eternity for guilt lies in the past.

Right mindedness listens to the Mind of God, merely overlooks and forgives what never happened. Wrong-mindedness listens to the ego and makes illusions. Where we saw evil and darkness we now see light and holiness. There is no need for help to enter Heaven for we have never left.

Choosing guiltlessness has brought me more freedom and joy. I now see a more kindly world and walk in gentleness.