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Elaine Carey

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WalMart
by Elaine Carey   
Rated "G" by the Author.
     
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The doors were open. One set, anyway. I thought they wanted customers.

 So I loaded up my cart and shopped.  It's spring break!  Start the party!  There's suntan lotion, batteries for my camera, and fake tan in case it's too cool to sun bathe.  I will not return to work looking like a white whale. 

When I looked for a checkout lane, this chagrined man was asking where people with full carts were supposed to go.  She gestured up the line.  But only two lanes were lit, both with "20 items or less" signs.  But she clearly didn't want him. 

      I followed him up to where the other, apparently more willing sales clerk smiled at him.  He piled all his junk, she rang him up, I piled up all my junk.  I directed two customers with smaller stashes down the way to where the other checkout lady loitered, unburdened by any customers. 

     "Did you find everything?" Ms. Checkout beamed. "Yes," I smiled, "But why don't they open a regular register?  I hate to checkout where the sign for twenty items or less is the limit." 

    "They want to make a way for people with less to check out quickly," she explained.  I know that.  I follow the rules.  I go out of my way in life not to annoy other shoppers, other drivers, people in queues and lanes and lines.  I don't want to get cussed out or booted out or even flipped a finger.  

    So....I guess WalMart simply wants no customers with big carts before 9 AM.  And my very nice checkout lady did not understand my question.   I have been giving them a chance to fix this dilemma every Saturday morning for the last two years.  No matter!  We'll try again next week.  I'm sure to need some lawn chairs, popsicles, hamburger, and more fake tan--or sunscreen, however the wind blows. . 

     


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