It is often we get so engrossed in a relationship, that we seldom see the "red flags." The signs are there, are we simply ignore them because we want the relationship so......bad.
It is not often we find ourselves feeling lonely because we choose, or have not found what we desire in a suitable mate. Well, when we do get involved, finally, we already have a precognition of expectations of what we want, and what we need. Now, giving your age, shall I say, after 40 years old, you should be ready, and able to see the "tell tale signs," of a falling relationship, but guess what, they are often missed, or simply ignored. Now say to yourself, I know where she is going with this, and perhaps you should, because more than often we see them, and we don't allow them to register in our minds are linger for any amount of time because we are too mesmerized by the simplicities of having the feeling of belonging, and who on earth, would want to deny that. But the truth of the matter the "red flags" are sent to allow us to run like hell, and let go, because as the saying goes..."if it's not working now, it won't work in the long run." So, now that we have established this, you can sit back in awe, and say, oh yea, "been there, done that." The question is not to change them, but to change you. How many times you were given that nagging intuition annoying at your inner self, and you said, "something is not right with this, but you continued, because once again you want to feel a sense of belonging. Here are a list of 'RED FLAGS" that should give you a cue to "RUN LIKE HELL AND LET GO"
1. If He/She never invites you to his house after 2-3 months of courtship..."Red Flag"
2. You don't have a phone number to his job or house, other than a cellular number "Beware"
3. If He/She never wants to meet during the day..."Red Flag"
4. Makes too many excuses when they need to be none..."Red Flag"
5. If He/She want to meet at a hotel, or at your place all the time..."Red Flag"
6. If you never meet their friends..."Beware"
7. No communications on where you two are going...and we are not talking walking down the aisle, but if it's been over a year, and they are still confused..."Run Like Hell"...there will never be one.
8. He/She is never around for the holidays, he/she always have some excuses..."Red Flag"
9. He/She don't want to be around your friends..."Beware"
10. You are always providing the cash during lunch or dinner..."Red Flag"
11. Watch what they say, most people will say what you want to hear, learn to read between the lines... most of the times they are telling you something..."Beware"
12.He/She is not romantic, or shows little to no affectionate...only during intimacy..."Beware"
I am not an expert when it comes to relationships, but common sense always prevails. A relationship is to be shared by two, and there should never be second guessing, or a feeling of feeling lonely. You should be able to communicate with your mate, feel free to share and ask questions, know their whereabouts and have a sense of no boundaries between you two. If the "red flags" nags at your soul, take heed, it is usually a warning sign of more HELL to come.
Be good to yourself, and one another. Love with respect, dignity, and grace. And enjoy the Magic of Love.
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"Know When To Run Like Hell...Letting Go...and Seeing The Red Flag..."
Powerfully written article and wonderful topic.
I agree that the signs are always there, but individuals will make a choice to overlook because they feel they are in love.
However I believe if it were really as true as they believe it these issues would not present themselves in the first place.
Sincerely,
Gwendolyn A. Thomas GATH
ps. and "...they should run like hell..." too!
Thanks
Did you write these yourself or pic them up from an article or book. I'm asking because I'm working on a book with another author on this very subject and am interested in other books on the same subject. ~~Nordette