While on a teaching assignment in China during 1988-89 a colleague gave me an opportunity to compare the marriage customs of East and West at first hand.

In 1988-89 I took up an assignment in a closed area of China's Guangxi Province. There, in the County of Yishan I lived and worked as the only foreigner, teaching in the English department of Hechi Teachers' College.* In those days Yishan had a population of about half a million people most of whom lived in very traditional life-styles. Very few had ever been face-to-face with a foreigner.

During my stay there I was given the opportunity to take part in a range of historical and cultural events. For example, I was invited to the Provincial Capital (Nanning) to be a special guest of the government at a sumptuous banquet to celebrate the Chinese National Day: an annual event on 1st October. There I met a host of provincial big wheels, including the Governor of Guangxi Province and the head of the Education Ministry.

I also had the pleasure of being invited by one of my English Department colleagues to a traditional Chinese wedding celebration. This invitation gave me a chance to compare at first hand the differences between the Chinese and Western ways of arranging such an important occasion.

In a traditional area such as Yishan, local custom ordains that the suitor should ask the family of his bride-to-be for their daughter in marriage. Consent being given, the two families meet to decide on a mutually convenient date for a public celebration. The couple then applies to the local authorities for a certificate of marriage.

I was invited to the celebration by my friend and colleague, Ling Zhi Fa. He had been officially married for some months, but wanted friends and relatives to celebrate with him and his new wife, Lan Li Mei (in China the woman retains her maiden name when she marries). All members of the English Department were invited and each of us contributed to a gift. Armed with our gift and an enormous bundle of firecrackers we arrived at their apartment, but before we entered we attached the firecrackers to a long pole and let them off. We then made a grand entry to the deafening roar of the fireworks to be met by Ling and Miss Lan!

Inside we were offered traditional drinks (Chinese rice wine) and the couple did the rounds of their guests, offering us candy, sunflower seeds and fruit. This was done in the traditional way, the bride carrying the offerings and the groom bowing with hands clasped.

Drinks were then served, this time the local version of Coke and Chinese tea. After that it was customary to engage in "free talk" which included the usual jokes about honeymoons and a bit of harmless leg-pulling aimed at the happy couple. Then it was time to go.

On the way out we were invited to make a traditional inspection of the nuptial bedroom. All the presents were laid out on the double bed and in the background were Chinese characters symbolising "double happiness" just above a magnificent wedding photograph.

This happy occasion occurred towards the end of my academic year there and was, for me, a memorable and educational experience.

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