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I spoke these words at the Wedding Ceremony of Mila Jesena and Bob Smith — St. Augustine’s Church, Grafton, West Virginia, USA April 20, 1996
N A N A Y
Three days ago, while I was still half-asleep in #25 West Bluemont Street, (GRAFTON, West Virginia, U.S.A.) I heard the voice of TINA. She was calling out. “NAY. . . NAY . . . NANAY . . . NANAY.”
My Brothers and Sisters . . . the word “NANAY” is a beautiful word. A meaningful word. But a word I have not used for almost half a century. . . .
“NANAY” means “MOTHER”. And OUR MOTHER is dead. Pat’s Mother. My Mother. And Mila’s Mother. OUR NANAY. . . . She died when she was only 41 and we were very, very young. And so, for almost half a century, I did not say “NANAY” because I could not say “NANAY”, for I had no more “NANAY.”
And so, TINA, and BETSY, and SUZIE . . . unlike your Mother, YOU are very fortunate — because you still have a NANAY. You still have a Mother. (At this point, Fr. Maseoli must be thinking, “Fr. JJ, you are supposed to talk about the gospel!” Fr. Maseoli, this is about the gospel.”)
Our gospel today enjoins us to love God with our whole heart and mind and strength. ALL our heart and mind and strength. . . . But HOW? Yes . . . how? Like my NANAY for her Juni, and my NANAY for her Pat, and my NANAY for her Mila . . . How? Tina, like YOUR Nanay for YOU. Yes, like Mila Jesena for Tina and for Betsy and for Emgee and for Joy . . . Like YOU, all of YOU who are Mothers. Like all of you Mothers, loving the helpless babies of your own womb.
My Friends: LOVE is the only thing really worthwhile in life. And in this world of ours there is so little, so very little love. And so I . . . I am often tempted to despair, to give up . . . for it seems so impossible to have, and to enjoy, to SHARE LOVE in this, this Valley of Tears. But then I see a NANAY and the heart of a NANAY . . . and I, I have to BELIEVE again. And I am INSPIRED again. And I am ALIVE again.
For LOVE and NANAY, NANAY and LOVE, they are interchangeable terms. They mean the same.
Ladies and gentlemen, in our love-starved world, our MOTHER, our NANAY, is LOVE. And what I’m saying is: You, Tina, you, Betsy, and you, Rev. Robert Edward Smith III, you are all very, very fortunate. . . . Because you are loved . . . Tremendously. . . By Milagros Cajili Jesena, who above all . . . is a NANAY.
A NANAY, A Mother . . . to her patients in the hospital . . . A Nanay . . . to all her children, and to everyone who needs her. And a wife to you, Bob.
Mila, she is a woman, a person-for-others. You and I have all experienced her goodness. And her sacrifice. And her tears. And her suffering and her pain caused by the blindness and the insensitivity and the ingratitude of those whom she has served. Yes, the blindness and the insensitivity and the ingratitude of those whom she has loved. Yet she continues to serve, and to love.
And you Bob, you, Robert Edward Smith — You, you are exactly like her. A man, a person-for-others! One who loves and serves. For you have offered your whole life so that others may live. And your Calvary, YOUR love is not once in a lifetime, but everyday. Like JESUS. Like GOD.
Bob . . . you are to me proof that there IS love on earth. You are an inspiration, giving me light and enthusiasm . . . that our weak and sinful world still belongs to GOD and to His incarnate and transcendent kingdom of love and service and grace.
And so I do not know who is the more fortunate. You . . . because you have Mila or Mila because she has you. Maybe . . . maybe GOD in HIS goodness has given you this wonderful MILAGRO — this miracle. His wonderful MILAGROS. Maybe because you have given love and have become love, God has gifted you with love. How beautiful, how wonderful, how good is our God!!!
My Brothers, my Sisters, three days ago while I was still half-asleep in #25 West Bluemont Street, I heard the voice of Tina. She was calling “NAY . . . NAY . . . NANAY . . . NANAY!!!” Yes it was Tina. But it was not only Tina. It was you and I and every soul upon this lonely earth. Searching, hungering for LOVE.
And for GOD. For we are all, all born for LOVE and born for GOD. And in the battlefield and the garbage dump and the cesspool that is life, God still gives us, everyone . . . everyone of us — our NANAY, our MOTHER, our foretaste, our glimpse, our guarantee . . . of HOME . . . and LOVE . . . and GOD.
Today, my Brothers and Sisters, let us open our eyes today and say, to our GOD of LOVE . . . “Thank you . . . Thank you . . . Thank you.”
v v v
(Delivered at the Wedding Ceremony of Mila Jesena and Bob Smith — St. Augustine’s Church, Grafton, West Virginia, USA April 20, 1996.)
~ acj ~
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