If I became a Priest, if I am still a Priest, if I have been able to do any good at all, it is all because of God...

“WHY ARE YOU A PRIEST?”



Young MARK SUNTAY of Xavier Grade School asked me, “WHY ARE YOU A PRIEST?”

I had answered that question, oh, a hundred times before… after all, I have been a Priest for 30 years…But this time I wanted to give a better answer to young Mark Suntay.

“I am a Priest,” I finally said, “I am a Priest BECAUSE GOD WANTS ME TO BE A PRIEST.”

For the first time, I felt at peace about my answer.

In the past, I would say something like “I am a Priest because I chose to be the NOBLEST thing I could be.” But in that version, I would be the HERO.

And then I would launch upon my story about what happened when I was eleven years old. For when I was eleven, the Jesuits began brainwashing me.

I was studying in Lincoln School in Iloilo City, and Atty. Johnny Jamora, the owner of the school, and a very loyal Ateneo Alumnus, always invited the Jesuits to give the Annual Retreat to the students and faculty…and so the Jesuits gave the Spiritual Exercises every year to everybody in Lincoln School. Maybe that’s why my cousin Willy Jesena joined the Redemptorists and Archie Intengan and I joined the Jesuits.

But aside from the fire and brimstone and the meditations on death, judgment, heaven, and hell, the Retreats also introduced us to a strong devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus, and to the gentle influence of Mary, The Mother of God. For we were members of the Apostleship of Prayer and the Children of Mary and the Legion of Mary, and we were passionately drawn to making the weekly Novena to Our Lady of Perpetual Succour at St. Clement’s in La Paz every Wednesday.

After all that, I chose to become a Priest.

NO! That version was wrong!

I did not choose God. IT WAS GOD WHO CHOSE ME, AND WHO MADE ME HIS PRIEST. GOD.

He… he did it very slowly. Very subtly.

At about this same time I would often go to Sunday Mass in Tanza parish with my cousins Manang Veling and Dr. Rene Magalona. One day after Fr. Verheyen’s Mass, Manang Veling asked, “Juni, why don’t YOU learn how to serve Mass?” I thought that was a good idea, and so I looked around for someone who could teach me how to serve Mass.

Our neighbor, Tiago Dolar, knew how to serve Mass. He volunteered to be my co-acolyte in Masses of Fr. Cornelius de Wit while I was mastering my Latin responses and learning how and when to ring the quadruple bell of the Tanza church. Finally, Tiago told me he had taught me everything he knew about Mass-serving, and I could now go on solo flight. Then he sold me his own blue soutana for two pesos and fifty centavos (P2.50)!

I was eleven. It had never, never entered my mind to be a Priest. But GOD—GOD had HIS plans.

Countless, unnoticed miracles. Each day. Saturating my heart, my mind, my whole being. Despite myself. Despite my pride, my sensuality, my weaknesses, my sins. Gently, lovingly, God was inviting me, enticing me. Until I had no more choice. Except to say yes. To HIM. And HIS LOVE.

For to be true to myself, I had to be true to Him. To be with Him. To lose myself and find myself totally in Him. Forever.

Little Arsenio Jesena. 75 lbs. Spoiled brat. From unknown Manapla and unknown Takurong. Surviving mostly on charity. And God’s loving Providence.

It was some anonymous afternoon, maybe at 5 o’ clock, after I had made the Way of the Cross, and after I had wiped all the pews of the Immaculate Conception Church in Tanza: I was just kneeling down there, in front of Our Lady’s beautiful statue. And I realized that I WAS IN LOVE. I was in love.

WITH GOD. I was in love with God.

All of a sudden. I realized I was different. My world was different. For God had become, had made Himself real. TO ME. And He had conquered
my heart.

And nothing else mattered. Nothing. Except God. And to be with God. Forever.

And it seemed that the best way, the only way to do that was to become a Priest.

But the inspiration, and the strength, and the perseverance – ALL CAME FROM GOD.

* * *

And so, my young friend Mark Suntay, there it is. God. It was God. God’s idea. Gods’s planning. God’s help. God’s forgiveness. God’s healing. God’s empowering.

I am a Priest because God wants me to be
a Priest.

* * *
All the other things, all the other persons, all the other events— were, and have been, instruments of God’s symphony of love for me.
My application to be a Jesuit, at the age of 13. My Ateneo education. Meeting Fr. Richard Leonard, S.J. My entering San Jose Seminary. My becoming a Jesuit. My Sacadas of Sugarland. My ordination to the Priesthood by Pope Paul VI.

My assignment to Bukidnon, to work with Bishop Francisco Claver and the Jesuits there.

My terrible vehicular accident, and its shattering aftermath… all the Masses and all the Retreats… the healings… “YAYEE”.. the Xavier School community… My many friends... etc., etc… all have been instruments of God’s
symphony of love… for me.

If I became a Priest, if I am still a Priest, if I have been able to do any good at all, it is all because of God, our wonderful God of compassion and love.

GOD. GOD. GOD.





Arsenio C. Jesena, S.J.