We all have fears. Mine just happens to be of storms...

All of my life, I have been afraid of storms. So is my twin sister. We do not like thunderstorms AT ALL.

We're 42 now; I can remember as a little girl, especially at night, if a thunderstorm blew up, my twin & I would sit up in the middle of the bed, throw our arms around each other, & scream at the top of our lungs. Mom would come tromping up the stairs, mad as anything; but once she turned on the light, we were fine. (It never dawned on us that the power could go out!) We thought we'd outsmart her; if a storm came, we'd turn on the light. She outsmarted us by taking the bulb out. We'd turn on the light in our closet. That one mysteriously disappeared, as well. So...what did twin storm phobics do? We'd go down to the basement & sleep in the room under the stairs! Unless the storm was really bad, you couldn't hear the thunder. NO PROBLEM!!! (This was in Ohio, where just about everyone has a basement.)

It's different now...Everytime the skies turn dark, flashes of lightning light up the horizon, peals of rolling thunder rumble, & the winds pick up, my fears intensifies. The worse the storm is, the higher my fears.

Living in Texas, right in the middle of "Tornado Alley," does not help. Thunderstorms can develop with AMAZING suddenness. It can be clear one hour, the next, a severe thunderstorm is raging. I've been in three tornadoes...thank God, they weren't really strong ones (F-1 on the Fujita scale), but the third one was bad enough to peel the roof off of two sections of the apartment complex I live in. (And there I was, hiding in the bathroom, WISHING I had a basement to hide in!!) Needless to say, Springtime in Texas is NOT my favorite time of year.

That's one thing I've never understood...living in the middle of "Tornado Alley," WHY isn't it MANDATORY that underground shelter be made available?? Oh, I know some of the reasons why. The water table level is too high, the ground shifts too much, they'd be underwater all of the time, snakes & spiders make their homes there (I'd just don my swimsuit, & tell the snakes & spiders to stay on THEIR side & leave me alone!!); it's too expensive to build basements in Texas. Personally, between you & me, I think it's because they're too lazy...A life is worth much more than the expense of building shelter. Now that I'm off my soapbox...

Let me tell you something. I have not one, but TWO weather radios; the Weather Channel is one of my favorite channels; I'm always aware of what the weather is doing. When I'm on vacation visiting my Dad, he gets annoyed because I want to watch the Weather Channel! "The weather's gonna do what the weather's gonna do," he tells me; "If it's your turn to go, there's nothing you can do about it." (True, Dad...but I wanna be forwarned!!) "The hills behind us" [there is a woods behind Dad's house & a big hill] "are going to protect us; a tornado has NEVER hit here," he says. (True, Dad, but there's always a first time...NEVER say "Never.")

I wrote the following poem a couple of weeks ago, describing my fear.

"STORM PHOBIC"

jagged lightning splits
angry, bruised-black skies
the clouds shattered by
shock waves of thunder-
sound...very intense
the warning sirens
sound...the noise chills my
blood...fear grips my heart...
(can't remember what i
am supposed to do)
strobe flashes of light
illuminates the
fear on my face...of
knowing the massive
storm IS STALKING ME
i know the roar of
rainfall mixed with hail
hides the screaming of
a tornado...i
imagine the worst
all i can do is
hide in the shelter
of a downstairs room
(central location)
i pray it's enough
the power dies...i'm
sure i'll be next...i'm
afraid...the thunder
outside absorbs the
thunder of my heart
i am shaking scared
panic overtakes
my mind--WHAT WAS THAT?!??
breathing is ragged...
must calm myself...HOW???
sweat runs down my face
feel like i'm gonna
throw up...feel stupid...
because no one acts
like this when it storms
more time between the
flash of lightning &
sound of thunder; rain
seems to be easing;
winds aren't as strong
the storm loses its
intensity; thank
God...i've survived...it's
over...until the
next severe storm comes

There you have it: the confessions of a certified storm phobic! To those of you who don't understand, or suffer with the same symptoms, there is an EXCELLENT web site available to help you understand why your loved one sprouts feathers everytime it storms, or if you are the one that's sprouting feathers, let me recommend it to you. STORMPHOBIA.ORG.