Dana takes life too seriously, doesn't even try to find happiness for herself. She is always worried about someone else in her family.

CHAPTER 1
Wed. July 7th 6:26 a.m.
Dear Diary,
I know I haven't written to you in a LONG time. I think it's been five years now. You helped me through some hard times before and I hope you can again.
It looks like another scorcher today. I sure wish we'd get some rain, we haven't had any for so long now. So much depends on it. What am I going to do? So many darn problems, the back taxes, the money so Lynn can go to college, and then there's me. What about ME? I'm 23 years old now, running a small vegetable farm and working 4 nights a week at the factory. I've never had a serious relationship, I'm still a Virgin for Gods sake! I know I shouldn't let that bother me, but why haven't I met someone for me yet? I can't imagine what it's like to be with a man, let alone to be intimate with one. Sure I've gone out with some of the boys around here, but BOYS is the key word. And then, the ones I have been with seem to be afraid of me. Why? I just wish someone special would come into my life. I'm basically happy but something just seems to be MISSING. Well that is enough of that!
Mom's working too hard as usual, I still can't get her to slow down. Lynn's grown so fast, and she's always so busy baby sitting at the Williams or with Bryan that I hardly get to see her anymore. Yes, I know I better stop feeling sorry for myself and get to work. Thanks for listening. BE BACK LATER
6:43 a.m.

The sun was just starting to brighten the large kitchen as she started making breakfast for herself and her sister. She could feel the heat penetrating the house already and dreaded the rest of the coming day. The heat seemed to be draining everything and everyone. She didn’t even think the shorts and tank top she had on would be even cool enough today.
"I bet she won't even eat this," she announced to the empty room while placing the eggs and bacon on a plate.
"Dana!" A panicked voice came from somewhere in the house. "Do you know where my pink blouse is? Bryan is going to be here in about fifteen minutes for our picnic!"
"Shhhh!" Dana scolded, running over to the hall. "Mom's sleeping, she didn't get in until early this morning. Your blouse is in the closet where it belongs."
Lynn whispered down the hall, "Sorry Mom," on her way to the kitchen tying her blouse over a fuchsia tank top. "Dana I'll be back about three, long before I have to go sit for the Williams’ tonight."
"Did you pick up your room and get your laundry ready for me?" She asked while setting a plate in front of her sister. Dana really hated sounding like a mother but sometimes she really didn’t have a choice.
"I told you Bryan's going to be here in a few minutes and you know how he hates to wait." She practically whined before taking a bite of toast.
"Alright, alright," Dana shook her head. They were total opposites in looks and attitude. She didn’t know if it was the age difference or not. Lynn was blonde, blue eyed and still a teenager yet she knew what she wanted in life.
While Dana was a brunette, brown eyed and did what needed to be done no matter what and sometimes she felt really old. "I'll do it myself this time, but next time I just won't wash your stuff."
How many times had Lynn heard this? She smiled knowing she got away with it again as always.
"Lynn, I have to water those tomatoes and cukes tonight. Do you think you'll be around to help?"
Sitting down at the table Lynn shook her head, "Nope. I doubt it. I never know when the Williams’ will get home but it's almost always late."
"I wish we'd get some damn rain!"
"Dana!" Her sister exclaimed in fake shock. "You better hope Mom didn't hear you."
"I don't care if Mom heard or not," she looked away in frustration. She had too much on her mind to worry about her ‘language’. She had to talk to her mother about the taxes anyway and she knew it would be loud as usual. Her mother was her best friend except when it came to some of the serious things like taxes.
"Dana.......Daaana!" Lynn's voice brought her back. "Day dreaming again?" Her eyes lit up as she remembered a more important question, "Oh yeah, is Buzz coming around here today? Because if he is, I'll make sure that I'm not," Lynn had run into him enough at times herself, drunk or not he would badger her for information about Dana. She knew how her sister felt about him and most of the time they were able to avoid him, but sometimes they weren't so lucky.
"I don't know. I hope not, he's really becoming a pain in the.....," she didn't need to finish.
Lynn just smiled in response, until she suddenly heard Bryan's old Ford F150 pickup roaring loudly up the driveway. She quickly ran out the kitchen door yelling, "Bye, see you later!"
"See, I knew it!" Dana scowled at the plate on the table. Throwing her hands in the air, talking to the empty room again. The only thing her sister ate was half a piece of toast. "Why do I even bother?"
When she had calmed down, she heard a familiar sound just outside the kitchen door. Moving to the door she opened it admitting a very large striped cat. "Oh Sassie, I'm sorry. I forgot all about you this morning." A look of disgust showed in the animals’ greenish-gold eyes before she meandered across the room. Dana stepped into the pantry to grab the bag of cat food, then over to the refrigerator to get some cheese for a treat. She set the dish down for the hungry feline, "Sassie are you keeping that darn old fox away from the chicken coop?" The cat didn't even look up from her breakfast. Not expecting an answer Dana moved over to get another cup of coffee.
A taller yet slightly older version of Dana stood at the hall archway, her tired eyes squinting in the bright morning sun.
"Mornin' Mom. Want some coffee and Lynn's breakfast? I can warm it up."
Her mother nodded, "So that was Bryan's truck I heard." Her tired smile showing as she sat down at the table. “I wonder when he’s going to fix that dang thing.”
"Yes, they went out to Otter Lake for a picnic. Lynn said she'd be back at three, before she has to baby-sit." She set a cup of coffee in front of her mother and took Lynn's plate from the table, placing it in the microwave.
"I hope Lynn and Bryan don't make any serious plans until after they're done with college," her mother said with a worried frown.
"Me too," Dana answered turning to check the food. We're both working for Lynn's future and what do we get out of it? Oh, stop it! She scolded herself, she had to quit feeling sorry for herself. "Mom?" She inquired as she set the warmed breakfast in front of her mother.
"Yes Sweetheart?" She answered while sipping her half-cup of hot brew.
Taking a seat across from her, Dana finally dropped her bomb, "What are we going to do about the back taxes?" Fearing the out come, she rushed on, "I mean the crops aren't doing so well and if we don't get good prices at the market we'll lose the farm."
"Oh Dana, I wish you wouldn't worry so much. We'll work something out, we always do." Her mother replied, feeling all of her forty-four years while stroking the ever-present feline with her foot. "Don't we?"
Dana was terrified of losing the farm and didn’t know how to get through to her mother, she changed the subject a little, "Are you going to be able to help me water tonight? You know Uncle Ralph just can't handle it anymore with his arthritis," Dana said sighing loudly as she thought of the old man she dearly loved. She knew he may not be family by blood but he has always been there for her, “small handyman jobs is about all he can handle anymore."
"No Honey," she replied looking away knowing she was worrying her daughter more. "I have to start work at two this afternoon and I don't know when I'll be done. I never know."
"Mom why do you work so hard and for so little at that place?" Sounding disgusted she shook her head. "I don't understand it. Kelly sure doesn’t pay you what you are worth. What do you have to show for it but more bills?" She didn't really mean to sound so harsh, yet she just didn't know what to do. And her mother gave the impression that she didn’t care. Dana felt so depressed, she just couldn't handle it alone anymore.
Frustration showed in her older eyes, they had gone through this so many times. "Oh Dana! Stop it!" She stormed from the room, walking into the living room.
"Here!" Her mother said as she returned, throwing a small book on the table as she sat down to finish her coffee.
"It's a savings book. Who's?" Dana questioned, frowning at this woman she had known all her life. Her mother didn't answer, she just continued drinking her coffee.
Dana opened it, suddenly looking up at her mother in confusion. The book was made out to her and Lynn with their social security numbers. Glancing back at the book again and flipping the pages, her eyes widen at the amount. She saw there was over seven thousand dollars in the account and that it had been started almost seven years ago which was right after her father had died. "Why?" She asked herself not realizing she had voiced the question.
"To help you and Lynn. It's not much but part of this will help Lynn with some of her college." She wondered if maybe she had been wrong in showing this to her daughter. Even if Lynn would need her share in the fall, she still wondered if maybe she should have waited.
"But Mom," she protested still shocked, "if we pool this and my savings maybe, just maybe we can put the bank off for a while," her eyes were glowing with hope.
"NO!" Her mother cried, startling Dana. "That is for you and Lynn not the farm or me! I've saved this for quite a while, a little at a time." Her dark brows came together in a sad frown as she continued, "It's not a lot so if nothing else give your half to Lynn or your own kids someday. But not the damn taxes!"
"But Mom..." she interrupted wanting to convince her mother what she thought they should do.
"Drop it Dana! I'm still your mother and what I say goes. Understand?"
"Fine," sounding defeated. "So what are we going to do about the veggies?" She asked realizing it was a lost cause for now. "And the fences need fixing too." Dana knew she would just have to figure out some other way to work this all out.
"Why don't we hire someone to help out?" Her mother suggested hopefully, locking her eyes with her oldest daughter. She knew what the farm meant to Dana but wondered if she just might be better off without it. But then again maybe not.
"How can we, what will we pay him with our good looks?"
Shaking her head at her daughters sarcastic remark. "Let me finish," her mother stressed, "We could pay him by room and board, plus a small salary."
"But Mom...."
"Quiet now!" She raised her hand to stop Dana's interruptions again. "What we can do is put up a sign at 'Kelly's' and we'll give him about half my check each week. And they can stay in the cottage next to the barn."
"No Mom," speaking softly now. She realized that maybe her mother was right even if it did cut into the profit of the farm. "If we hire someone, we'll both share in the expense," she replied half-heartedly as she slowly got up. "I'll write it up before you leave for work." Reaching for the door Dana said, "Right now I'm running late and I have things to get done. Come on Sassie," she called, holding the door for the unusual cat.
As Sassie strolled toward the barn, Dana followed, heavy in thought. She wondered why her mother was so darn stubborn. Didn't her mother realize what this place meant to her? It was all she had. What would her father think if he were still here? They wouldn't be in this mess if he were still alive, she thought. After getting the feed from the barn, she stepped back out into the blistering heat, praying for rain.
At the sound of a vehicle Dana looked up to find a new blue truck pulling up. "Damn!" She mumbled watching as the familiar, almost six-foot man slid out of the Dodge Ram. His almost black eyes gave her an unwelcome chill. Moving quickly for all his huskiness, he grabbed Dana around the waist swinging her around, causing her to drop the pan of feed.
"Damn it Buzz! Get your hands off of me! I've got work to do!" She twisted out of his arms, bending down she picked up the pan with most of the grain still in it and stomped toward the chicken coop.
"Awhh, Dana Sweetheart," he purred following close behind. "You can at least give a friend, a hug hello."
His fake sweetness was rubbing her the wrong way. With everything else that had gone on today she was in no mood. Narrowing her eyes she stopped in her tracks. Turning angrily, "Don't Sweetheart me Buzz Hayward! We've never really been friends and probably never will!" Dana sighed with relief when she saw the familiar weathered face of Uncle Ralph as he came around the corner of the barn.
The ancient looking man gave Buzz a warning glance before he could reach for her again. "Dana did ya git' da stuff ta fix da barn?" He asked in his thick old country speech, throwing Buzz another dangerous look.
"I ordered it Uncle Ralph, but it's not here yet. ‘Hayward Lumber’ said it should be here this afternoon," she said then raising her eyebrows and glancing at the owner's son. She watched as Buzz totally ignored her comment.
"Okay I'll jist go'n check da fields, maybe by then it'll be here," Ralph said before slowly walking away.
Returning her attention to the unwanted guest, "Buzz what do you want? I have a lot to get done today," she told him sarcastically.
"I just thought that maybe you'd like to go out to a movie on Friday." Buzz was watching her very closely now and he didn't wait very long for her to answer, "How about it?"
"Uhhh.....No. I have other plans," she replied, trying to think of a way to get rid of him. Why did he keep bothering her? She couldn't stand him and she's told him no a thousand times. His constant drinking made it all the worse, it really had changed him. She took the few steps over to the coop opening the fence door so she could start feeding the chickens.
Gnashing his teeth, "A date Dana? Who?" He demanded, following her in. The chickens screeched as they tried to fly around the loud intruders, "Who Dana! I want to know now!"
It was the last straw, what right did he have anyway? They had never even dated! "It's none of your damn business, who or what, I do! I said No!" She quickly finished the feeding and started for the hen house to collect the eggs.
She didn't make it as Buzz seized her upper arm in anger, causing the pan to hit the ground once more. He smiled when he saw her wince in pain, "I wouldn't keep talking like that Miss High and Mighty."
She could smell the odor of stale whiskey as he spit this out and squeezed her arm some more. She wished Uncle Ralph would come back.
"I'll have you one of these days, you'll see!" He yelled, finally letting her go roughly. He stormed out of the coop with a loud bang and marched over to his truck.
The birds were in a fit as Dana rubbed her arm and watched him speed away making a huge cloud of dust in the yard, which didn't calm the chickens any. "Damn him!" She stomped her foot, coughing. "What do I have to do to keep him away?"
"Are ya alright girl?" Dana jumped at Ralph's voice, coming from the other side of the cage. "That boy's a gonna git his-self in a heap of trouble one of d'ese days. Big trouble."
"I'm alright Uncle Ralph, he's just spoiled and a pain in the..." then asking quickly to change the subject, "How's everything in the fields?"
"Very dry. Ya better water ta-night," a frown of concern showing on his wrinkled face. "Got anyone ta help ya?"
"No, Lynn has to baby-sit and Mom's working," her shoulders dropped as she suddenly felt so tired. "I'll do it after work tonight. You're going to be starting on the barn later so don't you worry. Besides Mom and I have come up with a way to hire someone."
"Have ya now?"
"Yeah," giving him a warm smile, "If you have some time you could start cleaning up the other cottage. What you can't get done, I or the person we hire can finish. Okay?"
"Sure," he said with a shrug, "What ever ya say."
"See you later Uncle Ralph, I have some laundry to do and Lynn didn't have time to help. So you know that's going to take time," she gave the old man another smile and a quick hug as she headed back to finish gathering the eggs.
Walking into the warm kitchen Dana found her mother had cleaned up the breakfast dishes and had gathered the laundry, starting the first load.
Dana quickly put the eggs in on the bottom shelf in the refrigerator. She was getting a glass of water when her mother came back in.
"Is there anything I forgot to put on that list?" Her mother motioned toward the table.
Picking up the list Dana looked it over, "No not that I can see, except Lynn mentioned yesterday she needed some hairspray." Leaning against the counter she took another deep swallow from her glass.
"Okay, I better write that down so I don't forget." When that was done she looked at her daughter, "What are you doing this weekend?"
"No plans," shrugging her shoulders. "Other than I'll probably have to keep watering every night."
"Well, maybe not if we hire someone soon," her mother smiled.
"I think it's going to take a while Mom. There isn't anyone desperate enough to take such a hard, low paying job." Knowing she would have to do everything herself for a while longer. It wasn’t just having to do these jobs, she just wished everything wasn’t so hard to handle on her own besides the factory job.
"Honey, we get a lot of drifters through Kelly's. We'll just wait and see what happens." Picking up her purse and keys. "Was that Buzz I heard leaving in such a hurry?"
"Yes," she responded making a face. "He wanted me to go out with him Friday, the pain in the Ass."
"Dana! You know I don't like that kind of language in my house." With a slight smile she adds, "but I agree with you. I hate it when he and his friends show up at Kelly's after the bars close. A real pain, yes."
She really didn't want to talk about Buzz, she looked at the clock, "Better get going Mom, less than four hours until you have to be at work." She reminded her. "I'll have your uniform ready when you get back."
Her mother went out the screen door, "See you in a little while." She waved as she moved toward the old Chevy. "Bye Honey."
"Bye," Dana answered waiting to hear if the Malibu would even start. You were lucky if you got it started now, let alone in the winter without a jump. But it started loudly. We sure do need to get that thing tuned up she thought, and we can afford that like a hole in the head.
Dana decided she better get started on everything or she wouldn't be done before she left for work. Just as she was about to pick up a basket she heard Sassie at the door again. "Alright, you can come in but you better stay out of my way." She warned the big cat that strolled in looking around a bit. Dana watched as Sassie plopped herself down under the kitchen table to take a nap.
Dana thought she better start something for lunch. She got out some chicken and vegetables, and threw it all into a big kettle with some water for soup. She knew her mother would enjoy it, even in this heat. After it was set to boil she grabbed a basket and went down to the basement to work on some of the laundry before her mother returned.
Entering the basement, she stood there for a moment, enjoying the cooler temperature. As she was putting the clothes from the old washer into the dryer, she thought about the talk with her mother. They were good friends but she was real glad her mother didn't ask her anymore about Buzz. Her arm was still sore, she’ll probably have a good size bruise by tomorrow. This wasn't the first time he had hurt her but it's been a long time since he's been able to get close enough without someone else interfering. She avoided him when ever possible, which wasn't easy when he was after her all the time to go out with him. Dana really wished he'd find someone else and leave her alone. She started another load before heading back upstairs.