The men on the ship are all waving and smiling. They know they are home and the ones which have families waiting, can not wait to feel their arms around them and their kisses on their lips. Kids scream, the signs are out.

The men are starting their walk down the gangplank. The crowd cheers. Suddenly you are grabbed and hugged so hard you feel like your insides are going to break. The kids are picked up and start screaming. It is pandemonium in a wild happy way.

The families start gathering together and starting for their prospective cars. Now is the start of a new life. You have been separated for a long time. Growth on both sides has been achieved. You have a lot to talk about. There are some things you did not put in your letters or tapes. Maybe he will not like what I had done with the house?

You start to get into the car on the driver's side. "Not today babe. I am home I am driving my car." Life as you have known it for the past months or year is suddenly over. You finally arrive home. It seems strange to have your husband standing in your own home or maybe it feels like he was never gone.

If you can possibly get some family member to take the kids for a few hours would be great. You can have that private time you both have craved for months. The bedroom is the only room you want to be in for the next few hours.

During pillow talk your husband can ask what did you do with your spare time? If he is the jealous type he might be asking you if you had been seeing somebody? But what about him? Ships dock what was he doing during those hours? Accusations can fly being true or not.

Or the first thing he asks for is the check book. "I want to look at it and see what has been going on when I was gone." Slowly it dawns on you. The complete control I now had over myself and kids has now been taken back by my husband. I forgot how controlling he is. I am not the same person. I do not need to be controlled. I have been working making my own money while he was gone.

Now we have a real problem. Is the husband going to accept the growth his wife has achieved while he was gone or not? Is the wife going to go back to the way it had been before or is she going to step up and say, "I am my own person. Please treat me with respect."

Conflicts can escalate easily. This is how two people are desperately trying to cope with change. Some men can not take change and start swinging and drinking.

I do not know the answer but if you really love each other and you want your marriage to work. It will workout. Growth is good.

Thank you for reading my article. Please feel free to read my other articles on many different subjects.
Linda E. Meckler Copyright 2009

Linda is the author of her first published book, ?Ghost Kids Trilogy. "Christy, 12 and her Brother Brad, 16 move into an old house and meet Ghost Kids. Adventures keep you mystified until the hunt for Pirates' Treasure.
Love, Family Values and Charity burst off the pages.

Coming soon: Fight your Medical Insurance Nightmares   Let me show you how

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