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Stop Trying To Be Nice... and Be Kind! by jimi emmons
Rated "G" by the Author.
There is a difference between being nice and being kind.
A “School of Balance” Teaching
Stop Trying To Be Nice… and Be Kinder!
You’re probably thinking right now…What’s the big deal between being nice and being kind? Well, it’s a big deal and a big difference. Ever hear someone say this? I’m trying to be nice! A born-again believer has the capacity to be kind even when they don’t feel like being nice. But this is a spiritual skill set that must be learned and utilized to benefit from. The Bible has not commanded us to be nice per se. But, the Bible has specifically commanded the believer to be kind in Ephesians 4:32. Jesus explicitly teaches in the gospels to love your enemies, and do good to them that despitefully use you… the ability to do this is more akin to kindness than niceness.
Don’t get me wrong! Being nice is good. But, being kind is much better, and easier. It is much harder to be nice than it is to be kind. Why? Well, for starters… kindness comes from a different place than where niceness comes from. One must understand that…
Kindness is God’s strength and ability in you… to do good.
Niceness is your own ability and strength in you… to do good.
Kindness is a supernatural ability! Niceness is a natural ability. One is spiritual the other is carnal. One’s ability to be kind emanates from God’s strength. But, one’s ability to be nice emanates from their own strength. God’s strength is unlimited… but your strength is very limited. God’s power in you to be kind verses your ability to be nice… cannot be matched!
Being kind may not always look good… but kindness is always good. That’s because being kind means always doing the right thing for the right reason. Niceness on the other hand may look good… but it may not always be good. Being nice may seem like the right thing to do. You may even think you are doing it for the right reasons. But, the Bible says in Proverb 16:25 that… There is a way that seemed right to a man, but the end leads to death and destruction.
Get This! There are many people in life who would have fared much better in life if someone would have been kind to them instead of trying to be nice to them. The ability to be kind hinges on your willingness to speak and do the truth in love. I Corinthians 13:4 teaches that… love is patient… but love is also kind. The kind thing to do may not always be the nice thing to do. But, the kind thing to do is always the loving thing to do. That’s because…
Kindness Always Trumps Niceness!
If you only be nice when you are supposed to be kind you will miss the mark. Your actions will provide a disservice for anyone who needs to be served the truth. Often, niceness does little to unveil a prevailing problem. In many cases niceness will keep the problem thinly veiled. But, kindness has the ability to address the root of the problem. Whereas niceness only puts up with the fruit of the problem with nice words and nice acts. A kind word or kind act will open the door and expose the root of the problem as it paves the way for godly character building.
Again, don’t get me wrong! There’s nothing inherently wrong with being nice. It is still nice to be nice (as they say). But, it’s much better to be kind. Why, because when your strength and your ability to be nice runs out…
There’s Really Nothing Nice About You!
Jerimiah 17:4 teaches that… “The heart is deceitful above all things,
and desperately wicked: who can know it.”
This means that when your strength runs out… your heart gets exposed. Kindness in operation requires the faith of God which is the strength of God in you. That’s why one’s personal faith absolutely needs brotherly kindness added to it. In order for a nice act to qualify for a kind act it has to be added to your faith and then be powered by the Holy Spirit for godly fruitfulness.
It is very possible to be nice without being spiritual. But, kindness comes from a specific place of strength that is of God, in God, and from God. You cannot be kind in your own strength! When you try to be kind in your own strength… the best you could ever be is nice… until your strength runs out. Kindness needs faith to function… but kindness also needs your heart to be tender. Consider this scriptural validation… Ephesians 4:32
“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one
another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”
Any well-meaning, good intention person can start out being nice… but only the believer has the ability to finish with kindness! Spiritual fruit production is based on one’s ability to love.
A nice word is a good word. But, a kind word is a love word.
A nice deed is a good deed. But, a kind deed is a love deed.
A nice act is a great act. But, a kind act is an even greater love act.
God isn’t just nice to us… God is very kind to us… all of us… saved or unsaved!
Jesus is recorded in Luke 6:35 and Matthew 5:45 saying that…
“God is kind unto the unthankful and the evil.”
“God rain on the just and the unjust”
Remember… We are all recipients of God’s loving kindness! So, it’s really important that we vocalized our thankfulness. But, the believer has a higher calling to reciprocate God’s loving kindness to others unconditionally. Essentially, this is what it means… to be kind.
Take this home with you! The true “Biblical Balance Driven Life” requires that… one stop depending on their own strength to be nice to people… and start depending on God’s strength to be godly kind to everyone! With that said… Stop Trying To Be Nice… and Be Kinder!
Exhorting You Always
Balance-ologist / Jimi Emmons
Be Bless!... Be Balance!
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