A brush with Death and the Philosophical aftermath

Actually there have been a bunch of days after. Each day has made life easier and will continue to do so. I am, of course, referring to my recent bout with health. Much was learned from that experience.

I learned the acceptance of death.
I learned the slow increments whereby that acceptance comes upon a person.
I learned humility when I found how many prayer lists had included my name.

Death is a natural part of life. Life can not exist without its changing at the time we call death. It also changes at what we call birth. Life is but a brief existence between two very long eternities. Life does not end – nor did it have a beginning. Life just IS. The cryptic name of GOD “I AM” holds a lot of meaning which is seldom considered.

The life change which I recently avoided, is just that – a change. There is nothing mysterious about it when one realizes the eternality of Life. We have our beginning with GOD and will have our ending also with GOD. And if GOD cannot die, then neither can we.

The long term events leading up to the moment of change are observed by the inner being which I will call the sub-conscious – or Sub Q. (I am aware of many definitions of the sub-conscious, differing definitions being held by differing groups of variously learned individuals. There is no agreement on just what the Sub Q actually is, other than the fact of its existence.) I have simplified my definition to that of a 3 year old with responsibilities of running the physical vehicle we call the body. It does this very well. Being about as intelligent as a 3 year old, it has little to do other that run the body and remember all that happens. It has a marvelous memory.

As I said, a marvelous memory and the ability to connect memories. It remembers the subtle changes when a health problem arises and will marshal the body’s defenses against most illnesses. Occasionally it misses something and Medical resources must be utilized.
In my case, there were gradual long term changes which did not worry the Sub Q. These changes over the years were very slow, but gradually compounded until it was more than the body’s defenses could handle.

As these changes were developing, the thoughts of death became more common and more philosophical. The body was failing and Sub Q knew it, having missed the slow subtle changes that had and were occurring. Death became less fearful as the time approached until I actually began to look forward to the event.

For reasons of breathing discomfort, I checked into the hospital where the long, slow buildup of fluid in places that were not supposed to have such excess fluids, was removed. Immediately my thoughts and welcome of death vanished. Sub Q realized that death was not imminent.

What was learned? Natural death is exactly that, natural . . . and not to be feared.

Another lesson was humility. Emails of encouragement sent during this period of time, are still being found buried among the many thousands of eMails received. I have quite a stack which were printed out and will be placed in a special place of fondness. Included are some snail mail messages which are kept intact along with their envelopes. These messages/eMails came from all over the world and from many different religions. Such unity tells me that we are All One!

Prayer lists are everywhere, if what the eMails say are true – and why wouldn’t they be true ? The awesome power of prayer makes one feel like a piece of thin sliced meat sizzling on a griddle. The sensations felt were feelings of being HOT, but the thermometer indicated no extra warmth in the room. It was the power of prayer doing its work with my damaged body. This is very humbling as I do not feel worthy of such loving care and so much attention. It brings tears to my eyes to think on these things.

The French legend of “The Holy Shadow” is brought to mind. An unknown monk, priest, or other individual wanted to do good, but did not want to become proud of his accomplishments. So he prayed that he would be able to do good, but not know of the good deeds that he did. His prayer was answered. GOD allowed his shadow to bring healing whenever it fell on something in need of healing. That shadow caused the sick to be made whole, flowers to bloom, and all kinds of good to occur whenever it passed. The man never knew of this, no one ever knew his name, but that shadow . . . he became known as “The Holy Shadow”.

Much has been learned form the experiences of the past several weeks. Strength is returning, slowly but surely.

And all is well.



"The Year After" is a follow-up on this writing.