How a reader becomes involved in a story: character association?

Worthy Characters:
is worthy important?



Once I had a comment that "I don't think your heroine is good enough for the hero. I don't like her." Since most of the readers did not mention feeling this way, it took me a while to realize that the reader had fallen in love with the hero and was jealous.
How, I wondered, can I ever fix that!?!
I mean--would any heroine be worthy of this hero to such a reader? I mean--I love him, too. Would I have to write a heroine that fit every reader so they could see themselves as the heroine in the story?
THAT'S IT! I say to myself, of course!
My readers are women reading about heros! They want to be the heroine in the piece. It isn't a question of 'relating' to the heroine, it is 'becoming' the heroine.
OH, MY!
I suddenly realize that I'm not crazy about very many 'women' actors--why? Well, now that I look at it, it's because it is the hero I'm paying attention to in the movies. I wanna watch Mel and the heroine better be deserving of him--treat him right. Could it be that I become her in the concentration of the movie? Is that why I'm enjoying it? Perhaps I need to make a list of the actresses I like and define why. Perhaps I should make a list of the actors I love and define why. What type of stories are these actors/actresses usually taking parts in and making me love them?