Rev. Cheril Goodrich ©
What is Love?
We are all looking for that elusive “soul mate.” There are probably a lot more people who are still looking then there are those who have actually found this person. What sets them apart from the rest of society that seems to be searching and not finding?
All relationships are holy when they are viewed from a position of God Love. This would not be love the way we understand it from a physical level, but instead Love that is understood at a much deeper level, or from the level of Eternal understanding. A true God Love relationship comes out of an Eternal idea that is held in the present. It is not based on what we have learned in the past in that it is not something we try getting something from through manipulation or force. Imagine trying to force or manipulate God, and then it can be understood that a holy relationship is one that God has entered in with His understanding of Love instead of it being a physical interpretation that stems from an incorrect physical learning experience. God Love, or the holy relationship is what we share with all of creation that reaches beyond the physical experience, so it is not based on an idea of getting through force or manipulation. It is total, and nothing is left out so it comes out of an idea of wholeness. It is only in wholeness that we can return to our proper place and in this place we are able to share with all of creation. In this state of awareness we learn the true purpose of relationships. We learn that relationships that are holy were not made for the purpose of a physical experience, but instead have all of creation in mind. It is this understanding that leads us to the truth that the physical experience of love is merely an extension of Love’s Purpose. It is not for the purpose that we have given to love in our physical existence. When love is not held in the Mind of God, then the purpose of love has become distorted and will be used to force or manipulate another which is a violation of the Eternal Law of freedom.
Entering into a holy relationship
If we want a holy Relationship, or if we are looking for a holy relationship, there is certain criterion that must be followed. If it is not followed, then we are probably looking for a special relationship and are more likely then not to get what we are trying to avoid. The purpose of the holy relationship is happiness all of the time, whereas a special relationship does not bring happiness all of the time. We can however, be in a relationship that we are working towards making holy, which at times seems to bring us unhappiness. This relationship will show us all of the ways we have used relationships for unholy purposes that have seem to have brought us unhappiness. These are the times we feel anger towards those we may consider, and at time wonder if, they are our soul mates. If we can remember that relationships that are made in Heaven are not physical but instead derive their meaning from what is beyond a physical understanding, we can begin to forgive ourselves and others for their less then perfect behavior when things go wrong. A relationship that is becoming holy is in a constant state of learning forgiveness. Forgiveness means to overlook the problem and focus on the solution, it is not self sacrifice. When sacrifice is involved, we are in error and must place this sacrifice up to the scrutiny of the Eternal Law that has been violated that taught us that it is possible to sacrifice.
In A Course in Miracles, over and over again the Course states that The Plan is “not of our making.” It also states; “To each who walks this earth in seeming solitude is a savior given, whose special function here is to release him, and so to free himself. In the world of separation each is appointed separately, though they are all the same. And each one finds his savior when he is ready to look upon the face of Christ, and see Him sinless.”
“The plan is not of you, nor need you be concerned with anything except the part that has been given you to learn. For He Who knows the rest will see to it without your help. But think not that He does not need your part to help Him with the rest. For in your part lies all of it”.
If we examine this statement, and it is taken literally, then we can see that there is a Plan that has the ability to interrupt our interpretation of what relationships are for. It is also duly noted that our cooperation is needed for the relationship to evolve into something holy. This is done by making a decision to make a relationship holy by both partners, or it can be done by one. When we begin a process that has the ability to bring God into our relationship the violations of Eternal Law we have incurred while having a physical experience must be dealt with. This is how correction takes place and the relationship becomes one that God can enter. Until it is holy, it is just a physical experience that will continue to have the same mistakes without the hope of correction. We may find occasional happiness in the physical experience without God, but happiness is a gift from Heaven, and to be able to fully experience it, we must align ourselves with the Laws that come out of Heaven.
We need Help in discernment
Before we attempt a holy relationship, it is obvious from the Course, we must invite Help in and ask for a holy relationship to enter our life or ask that the relationship we are already involved in to become holy. By asking first, we can be assured that the right person will enter our life, if it is the right time. If we are not certain and we decide to try to make it with an individual that is not our savior chances are this relationship will not unfold to hold the Presence of Love or God. Even with this, sometimes the “savior” and the person we will spend that rest of our life with are not the same. Sometimes the savior is sent to help the person heal so they can prepare themselves for a physical partner that they will have for the duration of their physical experience. Either way, a bond forms between the two and some startling events occur that will end the doubt of The Plan that has been devised specifically for the individual’s involved.
The holy unfolding of a real relationship is not based on the physical idea of the ideal soul mate. The physical idea of a soul mate is the belief that there is someone somewhere in the world that was made especially for one person and this is the person that one will be with for the rest of their physical life. In terms of spirit, to be with someone is to include the whole or all of creation, so to explicitly choose to give God’s Love to one individual is a violation of Eternal Law. Eternal Law is different than body or physical law because it does not involve a body. A holy relationship involves an introduction into the mind a glimmer of our true reality and identity that goes beyond a physical understanding of love. It is a spiritual understanding of the Love Force. It is this new understanding of Love’s ability that is beyond a physical scope that a new purpose is introduced to all of our relationships, not with just the person we are romantically involved with.
Making the choice for a holy relationship
We are not forced to move out of a relationship that is special until we are ready to. We may even decide to marry an individual that is not the person deemed as our “savior.” Usually these marriages are not ones that are very enlightening. In fact, usually we leave them feeling that a greater hole has been made and we move on to someone else hoping that by some miraculous event that this relationship will be “the one”. This can happen, but generally speaking holy relationships begin as a commitment that is made consciously on our part. It is a decision that we do not like what our relationships have shown us thus far and we recognize that we do not know what to do to resolve the pain involved in our relationship choices. It is this moment in time that we reach out of time and begin new lessons that arrive from Heaven’s Gate to our door to give our relationship a new meaning that is not based on what we have known to be true before about how real Love relationships work. This is where we stop blaming another and begin to look at our own life as being the source of our pain. This kind of self examination forces us to deal with our past physical learning experiences that have taught us that love has a trait that it is not capable of having. In other words, we learn how we have learned to love incorrectly through association, or by the experiences we have learned from other people who may or may not have had our best interest at heart. This does not involve blame, but rather it points us to understanding that what we learned incorrectly a long time ago is over and we do not have to keep reliving the pain that has been associated with our love experiences. If we choose to hold onto the past by blaming another for what they did or did not do, then we are not ready to have a holy relationship and chances are we will fall victim to another failed relationship. This however does not mean that we were not taken at our word if we ask for and receive a holy relationship. In Eternity our word is our bond and once that bond is made it is still carried through even if we do not experience it at a physical level. Spiritual agreements cannot be broken, but living in time it may seem like this is possible. What happens at a higher level than the body, or at the spirit level, is not always experienced at the body level if there is fear involved. Fear will prevent the physical manifestation of what has already happened in Eternity. We do not understand this because we do not understand what happens when we enter into a spiritual agreement. We also do not understand how thoughts become form.
What this means for us
We have been given an opportunity to help heal the world. This opportunity is unprecedented in the spiritual history of the world in that our physical relationships have the potential to have Heaven enter into them. Never before has this been offered at such a grand scale. In all of the spiritual history of the world, this opportunity was only bestowed upon a chosen few that were deemed as having a righteous heart. This opportunity is now open to anyone anywhere that chooses to see their relationship in a new light and offer it up to scrutiny so it can reflect the Light of Heaven into the world. Think carefully if this is something that you really want. Do you really want to be considered a part of an Eternal Reality or would you rather stay committed to relationships that are only for purposes that defy our true love ability? This question may be difficult because when we open our relationship up to scrutiny, it is not a private affair anymore. Privacy is considered and honored in the realm of spirit, so this is protected first. Nothing happens without our consent. Without our invitation the relationship the Help that is needed to make our relationship holy will not enter.
We are fast approaching a time when this question will be utmost in our mind. It will become very difficult to stay in relationships that are not serving the purpose of Heaven. Our choice is the greatest ability we have for changing the purpose of the world. We can choose to make a difference by making the right choice and give a holy relationship to the world that God Himself has entered into and become a walking blessing that occupies world. We can also choose to keep our relationships superficial by leaving them outside of Heaven’s Gate and continuing on and getting what we have always gotten. The choice is ours, but the choice to stay outside of the Gate will become increasingly more difficult as time goes on. We cannot fight God or His Plan. We can choose to be a part of The Plan or we can choose to try to live without Heaven. Whatever we choose, in the end God’s Plan will prevail.
As we learn to make the right choices, we learn that we have always been a part of Him. Our relationships will prove merely to be a reflection of His Love and Presence.
