When I tell people I was emotionally abused in therapy, they often look surprised and confused. Abuse by a therapist simply does not fit our idea of what therapy is all about. But it does happen, and when it does it leaves the victim shattered.

The patient goes into therapy as a person needing help. They are vulnerable, and trust the therapist to help them. This relationship, unlike almost any other professional relationship, takes place in complete privacy. When the therapist becomes abusive, there is no witness or documentation. Often, if the patient complains, or speaks to the abuse, the all-powerful therapist will apply labels, such as Borderline Personality Disorder, that nullifies the patient's perceptions, and silences their voice. Even internally, the victim begins to doubt themselves and their reality.

After a five-year abusive relationship with a therapist, I felt as if I simply did not exists. Finally able to leave the abusive relationship, I sought out the help of another therapist. I was desperate. This new therapist told me she would have to take a couple of weeks to think about my story and wether she believed me or not. When she finally told me she woud "risk" taking me on as a patient, she said she would be watching my body language to see if it was congruent with what I was saying, If it wasn't, she would stop seeing me. I was so internally non existant, that I didn't even comprehend I didn't deserve to be treated this way.

At long last, I do understand. I have done the hard work of reclaiming my self and my soul. I wrote Mending the Shattered Mirror to tell the story of what being abused in therapy really means. I have a voice! I wanted to give a voice to all the victims of abuse in a relationship of unequal power. Most of all, I want to be heard by mental health practitioners. I want them to hear me, I want them to believe me, and I want them to understand.  

I truly believe most therapist are good, caring, ethical professionals who would never intentionally harm the people who come to see them. However, even minor boundary violations can have traumatic consequences for the patient. My story tells, from the patient's perspective, how very vulnerable and fragile we are within therapy, and how extremely important clear, ethical boundaries are to keep the space safe for those who seek out the help of a therapist.