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Blogs by L.T. Suzuki
Mortality & Writing 6/26/2009 6:42:45 PM
It’s been a strange week. With the passing of celebrities like Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon & Michael Jackson, it suddenly hits home that we, no matter how ordinary or famous, share a common thread: We are all mortal.
You are born, you live, and then you die. Of course, the most important thing is how you choose to live, but that’s for another posting, for another time.
Now, getting back to death & writing…
Maybe it’s because I was only nine years old when my mother died, that I grew up thinking I’d never live as long as she did. I spent pretty much my whole childhood, adolescence & a good chunk of my adult life wondering when I’d have a confrontation with the grim reaper (and I do mean confrontation, for I’m not one to go quietly into the night). When I reached 39, and then made it on to the big 4-0, I had good reason to celebrate. I never thought I’d surpass my mother’s longevity by one year.
Now, as the years continue to march right on by and I watch my own daughter grow, another matter arises. Nothing dark, brooding and mind-boggling like whether I’d live past 39 (I’m over that now), but more like a concern, a niggling little voice that comes to the forefront when I’m reminded that, unlike the Elves and Fairies in my stories, none of us are gifted with immortality.
First, it was a race to keep up with my daughter, now I find myself racing against time to get my next book written.
I would sometimes wonder what will happen if I’m in the middle of, or heaven forbid, I’m coming down to the last, crucial pages of my novel, and then fate deals me that crappy hands (I’m speaking of the ultimate crappy hand). I suppose all authors are faced with this. What will happen if I can’t finish my story? How can anyone finish it for me when nobody knows my characters as well as I do, or even know how I had intended the story to wrap up?
I suppose I can dwell on this and waste valuable time pondering this “what if” scenario, or I can use the time creatively and constructively, writing for as long as I can, the best that I can. And this is what I have chosen to do.
If anything, when I’m gone, my daughter will have a collection of my stories to read. She’ll recognize all my quirky traits that somehow manifests in some of the characters, even recognize some of my shared philosophies as a martial arts instructor as well as some of my goofy antics and brawls disguised in my stories as being pure fiction!
When that day comes, I imagine myself riding off into the sunset with Nayla and the men of the Order, but for my daughter, I’ll live on through my words. And what can be better than that? This will be my gift and legacy I will leave to her. Now, I must get back to work!
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