We all love our kids. I know this. Or at least any parent worth a grain of salt loves their children. And maybe love isn't even a big enough word, because it is, after all, just a word, and that feeling we have inside is so much bigger. I mean, wouldn't you give your heart, today, this minute, now, if one of your children needed it? In a blink, right? Without a thought.

I think, truly, that I didn't know love, the true depth and power of love, until I became a father. I have five children by two wives. I am fortunate, in that  both of the women sentenced to endure my presence are magnificent. They really are. I feel for them, because I'm about as lovable as a rash. I'm like battery acid...corrosive. Harsh. Cool. But I stray from topic: my children.

I sometimes have trouble with faith. Faith in myself. Faith in the inherent (or lack of) goodness in mankind. Faith in God. I struggle with these things. Until I see or think of my children.

Ben is amazing. My only Yankee child. I forgive him this. Smart. Too smart, even. Handsome. Quiet. Intensely loving and loyal to family and friend. My clone, almost, physically. He was my eye-opener, the first of my true blessings. He recently joined the National Guard, and I admire him (and every man and woman) for that willingness to serve. Born in a snowstorm, he has the strength of that storm. When his confidence in himself matches his potential, he will be unstoppable.

Megan, my only daughter. No doubt, the "Daddy's Girl" theory come to life. I adore her. She is both the most loving of children, and the most difficult. But I love even her difficult nature. I'm not sure I believed in zodiac signs until she came along. She's a Gemini, The Twins, and it holds true; two completely different personalities in one body. But she is beautiful in mind and countenance, extremely loving, a social butterfly; she's my angel. Warmth flows from Megan like sunshine, and anyone close can't help but feel it. I suspect she might end up a successful businesswoman, if she chooses, but I'm not sure this is where her true desires will take her. God help the man who lays an angry hand upon my daughter.

David, my first Texas son. So like me in so many ways, maybe my clone in personality. Poor guy. Cursed by my influence. He has a thirst for adventure, because he hasn't yet seen the ugly animals that feed on the fringes of adventure; death and pain and carnage. Loving and loyal, if there is a mean bone in David's body, I've never seen it. Easygoing. Kind. Intelligent. Thoughtful. Most admirable of all, maybe: gentle. David is a gentle (young) man. God must love a gentle man, as I do. Another National Guard soldier, I hope he is as proud of himself as I am of him.

Dylan. Texan number two, I'm surprised he can walk, because I carried him everywhere. He is very bright, a bookworm, a nerd, a wrestler, and proud of all these things. Dylan won't tolerate a bully, and his own small stature does not inhibit his tendency to take a stand for those who can't or won't. I love that about him. Not a true outdoors-man, he calls himself a "house-mouse" with pride. He loves books and reading. Stories. Fiction. He's young yet, says he wants to be a veterinarian, but I'm not sure where he will end up. I think I see a writer in him. Or a filmmaker. He seems to lean toward the creative. He works from the heart, and all his feelings show in his big brown eyes. But he is tough. He can (and has) endured pain and injury with courage that amazes me. He's still small enough to hold, and if I could give him pills to stay that way, I would.

Griffin, my third Texan, and my second Gemini. Like his sister, he is a study in dual personalities. Like Megan, he is extremely loving, but contrary and stubborn as a mule. He doesn't seem like your typical intellectual, but intellectual he is. Bright as hell. I'm not even sure how bright. He's my hands-on man. Whether it's working on a car or boat, cooking breakfast, baking cookies, or fishing, he wants to be there in the middle of making it happen. He is my shadow, and another to whom I'd like to give a "stay little" pill. He is ultra-family oriented, doesn't like to be without his mom or I, and especially doesn't like separation from Dylan. He is a reader (fact books), a wrestler, and an avid outdoors-man. He wants to be a veterinarian, and I think he might just do that. Griffin goes his own way in most things, and I'm happy that he, like Dylan, won't put up with bullies.

My children. My kids. My life. Even when I am filled with doubt in God, or God's intent, I think of them and have no choice but to accept Him, and offer thanks.

I guess that's all, for now. Not sure where all that came from tonight. Guess they were just on my mind.