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Adoption vs. Abortion- A Couple Letters Make an Eternal Difference 8/23/2015 7:28:39 PM
Controversial or not, adoption and abortion need to be discussed more. Why people might choose to get an abortion?
-Health problems
-Inconvenience
-Too old
-Too young
-Too many kids
-Job
-School
-Problems at home
-Rape
-Finances
-Avoid embarrassment
-Avoid parent’s anger
-Father left
-No help at home
-Sex Trafficking
Why people might choose to adopt a baby?
-Health problems
-Long to be wanted
-Too old
-Barren
-Loving home
-Fellowship
-Doctor’s advice
-Want a child
-Want more children
-Conviction
-Desire
-Love
-Joy
-Family
-Acceptance
The list goes on….
In light of this past week, abortion has been on my heart a lot lately. The videos and articles that have surfaced illuminated the ugly truth of selling precious baby body parts like merchandise in a back alley. The secrets, the lies, and the pain that have swirled around what is truly going on in our country for years are seeping out. There have been outraged lunatics strap bombs on themselves, rallies of angry mobs- alongside sweet white haired saints of God on their knees in prayer over this issue for decades. Why such an outcry of emotions? Why if it truly is simply “a woman’s right to choose” is so many women and men sickened by this choice? This is a free country by the way, isn’t it? The fact is- it is simply not our choice to make. Life comes from God. God created us with the ability to tell right from wrong. He also created absolute truth, and He created us with eternity in our hearts (Ecclesiastes 3:11). When people see life destroyed, it is a natural response to get emotional, to seek justice! But before we join the angry mobs, what does Jesus want us to do?
My thoughts went straight toward growing up with my twin adopted brothers. The pain and heartache that comes from adoption can be daunting, but speaking with ladies who have endured the heartache of abortion far outweighs them all.
A social worker dropped my brothers off with my parents when they were three and a half years old and have been in our family ever since. Anger, pain, heartache came along with the process of adoption, most definitely, but joy, love, and family came as well. The unknown was extremely hard. For many years there were many questions with no answers. Health problems arose, and without prior knowledge of the health history of their parents, treatment was difficult. Mental disabilities surfaced, and no answers. Later in their life, a step sister came on the scene and answered several questions, but even that was difficult to see the actual truth. Their mom had severe mental problems and couldn’t take care of them. Throughout the years, we loved them and they loved us. “Problems?” Yes, but there is no question, “blood” or not, they are family. Life would not be the same without either one of them.
Very nonchalantly an older friend of mine told me he knew someone at church that was pregnant; they found out that there were “challenges ahead.” The baby was expected to be born with some major mental and physical health problems. The couple proceeded to ask for prayer- and with a smile, announced it didn’t matter what the doctor’s said, they were having the baby. My friend voiced his concern about the quality of life that the child would have, and with a shake of his head- insinuated that “taking care of the problem” would probably be better for everyone involved. Yes, he was suggesting abortion. I proceeded to share my experience with my brothers, the kids with special needs I taught, and the amazing people I’ve met with special needs that taught me so much about life. He shook his head with disgust and heartache. Knowing this gentleman for quite some time, it took me back. I didn’t believe what I was hearing. He had children and grandchildren. The baby was born with health problems and mental problems, yes, but the parents were absolutely in love with that precious child. It is very evident that the “problems” they are facing are shaping them into the strong family unit God intended them to become.
I walked away from that conversation even more convinced that each life truly does matter. People do not create a child. Of course some of you are thinking, um, yeah they do! But the reality is the only thing that we as humans do to “create a child,” is enjoy another thing that God created. God creates a child. The “problems” that children face shouldn’t define who they are. Sure, that is part of life; we all have “problems” we face. God doesn’t make mistakes; God wasn’t sleeping or unaware when he made some people. He creates each person with great delight. He crafts each person exactly how He wants them to be; on purpose- for a purpose.
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. Psalm 139:13”
Abortion
Speaking with women who have endured abortion is heart wrenching. Fear, heartache, loneliness, anxiety, doubt, and the realization- what is done is done. One lady, whom I love dearly, told me the hardest part of having an abortion is passing through the time of year the baby would have been born, to count up each passing year how old that precious baby would have been, if only. If only she would have had the courage to face her fears and embarrassment differently. The graduations she missed, the Christmas’, and even their wedding day. All taken away in a cold desolate clinic, miles away from her hometown, without her family, without her boyfriend, without anyone knowing where or why she had gone- to live with the horrible secret that took only minutes to perform, but an eternity to live with.
Did she have a choice? She would say yes. Yes, she had many, many choices. She could have told her parents, her boyfriend, or her pastor. She could have given the baby up for adoption, or struggled to raise the child. She could have sincerely prayed for God to help her; confide in several Christian friends and family members. There were many more options that she and many like her could have chosen. Pro-choice is a weird term for what it truly means. The only choice in abortion is death for the precious life that God is creating in that mother’s womb, and heartache for years to come. A very small percentage of moms who choose to get an abortion have health problems, or have been raped in a violent crime. That type of situation is why many support the “right to choose”. They are extremely rare, and even then, the “tissue” that some are putting dollar signs on are actual people.
There is forgiveness, of course! The lady that I spoke about has asked Jesus to forgive her and she has forgiven herself. She warns other women to choose life not only for the baby’s sake, but for their sake as well. It is a choice that they will have to live with for an eternity!
Pro-life is very accurate on all fronts. Even the words ring truer… Life brings so much joy. Will it bring heartache? Sure, where there is life- there is sin. However, where there is life, there is also- love. Babies do not care what type of car a person drives, what kind of house they live in, or “who” their parents are. Babies begin in the safe haven of their mommy’s womb, simply wanting to be loved and cherished. They are no different when they come out. Love is life. Raising the baby with genuine love is worth more than anything money could ever buy.
Also, adoption is such a huge blessing for so many! There are many amazing safe havens to go get counseling, help, and guidance on how to find the right family for your baby. A local place in our area, Angel’s Cove, is a ministry where birth moms choose the family that will parent their child. The birth parent or parents literally have several families that are waiting to adopt and the mother can choose a family to parent their child. My sister and her husband have two precious daughters, but due to major complications delivering their youngest child, they are unable to have any more children. They are currently in the process of adoption. They have had heartache, but are pursuing another precious bundle of joy to nurture and cherish as their own. There are many out there who are willing and ready. There are thousands of ministries like, “Angel’s Cove”, around the globe; placing the bundles of joy in the arms of ready parents. The earlier the better or they can and will be put into the “system”. Foster care is difficult on children, but again, many miraculous testimonies have been shared from people who went through the system.
What does God want us to do? Get on our faces and pray (2 Chronicles 7:14)! Seek the LORD’s guidance for our part in helping with this major problem in our culture today. Get involved in local ministries that provide medical and spiritual help for hurting women. Visit local children’s homes to love on the kids and share what Jesus thinks about them. Support foster parents who are doing their best to provide for and parent the children in their care. Pray about adoption, pray about helping others adopt. Let your congressmen and women know of your convictions on the issue. Do your research and support the Godly ministries that are legally fighting for life on a daily basis. Don’t get mean spirited, that is exactly what Satan wants us to do, but stand up for what you believe. Love and respect people even if they are mean spirited to you. Trust the LORD, we were all born “for such a time as this” (Ester 4:14).
Wouldn’t it be amazing if adoption was as affordable and as accessible as abortion? Pray that would happen. It is difficult for adoptive parents to adopt, but there are many ways to make it easier for all involved. Please pray before you act, however, do NOT remain silent. Pray, talk, and pray some more. Listen to why people would truly choose to get an abortion. Some feel they do not have a choice. Some, like the sex trafficking victims, might not; another major source of prayer. Pray that they see one of the many other choices God will provide if they just endure. If you are on the fence about what God thinks about life, read the following scripture. Each life truly does matter! Please, CHOOSE LIFE!
Psalm 139
John 1:4
Genesis 2:7
Psalm 16:11
Psalm 56:13
Isaiah 42:5
Luke 12:23
John 3:16
John 6:35
John 10:10
