"First Paragraphs"
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Not bad might be able to squeese in a little more descriptions.


fee

1/4/2009 6:02:15 PM [ Report Abuse ]

A good beginning, but too many "one's" in the penultimate sentence, I think. You could try and tighten it up a bit, how about a start - "Did she blame herself for Roger's death - probably!" Just an idea.

1/4/2009 5:57:13 AM [ Report Abuse ]