Thursday evening I was told by the manager of my business unit that I am going to be spending the next two years working in Angola. I'll be on rotation. 28 days in Cabinda, Angola, and 28 days in the U.S. for the next two years.
If you know about the world then you are aware that Angola is not a good place to go under any circumstances. I will be living within a compound, right on the beach. It is not safe to leave the compound. (But- knowing ME, I'll do it anyway.) There are constant threats and concerns. Malaria, those pesky blue-balled MONKEYS, big-assed bats (one got after one of my team mates just last WEEK), a multitude of poisonous / just plain HUGE and man eating snakes, political unrest / rebel armed forces, a general population made up of people who decided not to flee ( most Angolans ran away to safer ground during the civil war and still live as refugees- the ones that remain considered themselves tough enough and well armed enough to survive the civil war there), land mines, street gangs, 20 ft. crocodiles, Hyenas, and Baboons.
I'm still digesting the news. In a state of shock, kind of.
My first feelings are fear and sadness. Fear of leaving my home and family, mostly.
It is heart wrenching to be apart from my loved ones (my lovely daughter, her love, Alex, and my sister) and My VLADIMIR. I LOVE my dog. He is my constant companion, and I can't IMAGINE what he is going to think about all of this. He is so sensitive. The time I have with my family and my beloved pet is such a precious gift. I'm sitting here crying AGAIN, as I face all of this. Must be hormonal. I love my life. I have fought hard to get where I am, have what I have, and do what I do. Seems weird to leave it behind and vulnerable. Maybe it's not vulnerable. I guess we will see.
It is extraordinary, however, that I got this assignment.
I had just layed out an outline for my newest book less than a month before I got this news. And the book is set in Angola. So- I must go there to take advantage of the opportunity to get first hand knowledge, information and experience.
Weird how it all 'played out'. So- I'm going to get paid to go there for 28 days, and then, I will get to stay home and WRITE for 28 days. And so on, for the next two years. I hope that this book (no title for sure yet- but right now I'm calling it "Bred Into Existence") will be out by June, 2007.
I have always written lesbian erotica, and these days poetry. And while the new book still has a strong lesbian main character, it is NOT strictly an erotic story. Although, because it is ME writing it- it will have some steam. It is a story of survival, and all of the desperate acts (with their consequences) that are sometimes required to survive. But it has a really interesting twist.
In the meantime- I am shopping for snake bite resistant clothing and footwear, and taking a crash course in Portuguese.
OK. So that's it.
Thanks to everyone who understands my reluctance to be confined "within the lines". I have had remarks about the "non-form" of my poetry.
I don't necessarily follow all of the rules. Sometimes the end result is even BETTER that way.
Love, love and more LOVE to all of you wonderful and supportive folks that read my work, and to the ones that are so kind and loving to give me great reviews. You are all awesome and talented artists whose work I love and respect, and whose opinions I welcome. How lucky I am to be in such great company!
Now- I'm soon going to go step over some snakes, drink some beer, and see what kind of adventure this leads me to.
During the 1960's a young soldier struggles with basic training, a bully sergeant and his own inner demons. A tale of struggle, redemption and survival.
A young technician mourns his lover until he meets another man - a man with a secret. But there are other secrets as a jealous ghost returns to protect his turf.
During the 1960's a young soldier struggles with basic training, a bully sergeant and his own inner demons. A tale of struggle, redemption and survival.
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