Dissident and renowned silver maker, Paul Revere was arrested tonight for DUI and the illegal riding of a horse through the township after the witching hour.

Mr. Revere's loud proclamations awakened many residence, alarmed a few cats and caused Farmer Wilkins cows to stop giving milk.

Local citizens called 1-7-7-6 to report the disturbing incident prompting law officials to seize the crazed hooligan promptly.

Something must surely be done to stop the shenanigans of these young rebel rousers.  Honest people who must rise with the sun are not looking upon these youthful but shocking incidents with much favor.

What's next, one must ask one's self...why before you know it, people dressed like wild indians will be throwing perfectly good tea into the ocean or something just as alarming.

Film at eleven....