Hi, Queens!

I've been doing lots of presentations, mainly about personal and professional development issues. As I am teaching and sharing, I keep being reminded that it's important to "practice what you preach." And while regularly talking about ways to enhance your life or to fulfill your goals and aspirations, I have opened myself to "practicing what I preach." Whew!

Here's a reprint of an article I wrote for Carolyn Howard - Johnson (http://www.sharingwithwriters.blogspot.com/). She'll be printing it next week. So you, dear Queens, get a sneak preview!

SIX DEGREES FROM YOUR WISHES

Recently, I delivered a presentation on the subject of networking. “Yawn.” Right? Keep reading. You might be surprised at how interested you will be.

Ever heard of the Law of 250? The story goes most of us know on average at least 250 people, which translates…we have some level of relationship with 200 to 300 individuals. The approximately 250 people you know also know about 250 too. If you do the math that means you have access to 62,500 individuals within what is considered your second level of contacts. That’s a lot of people and resources.

The Small World theory, introduced by social psychologist and researcher Stanley Milgram, hypothesized that people in large social networks, such as the United States, are linked to each other via chains of “intermediate acquaintances.“ His results demonstrated unrelated people within a larger network could typically find each other within six layers. The phrase, “six degrees of separation,” popularized in 1990 by an American playwright John Guare is based on the Small World experiment.

What does this mean for you and me? This is the part I love. We have our personal contacts to cultivate. It is our job to build relationships with our inner circle of friends and acquaintances. That’s it. Nothing more. What’s even better is that we don’t have to look for important or powerful people. We look for the people who cross our paths and who we develop a kinship with. Then we allow the Small World theory to do the rest.

Here’s how it worked in my own life. In 2005, after "Grab the Queen Power" had been accepted by my publisher, I was asked to seek out a celebrity endorsement. My first response was to laugh. Right! Let me pull out my rolodex and look up the long list of celebrities I know personally. That’s a big goose egg. After laughing, I then started thinking, “Why not?”

I jumped in without a plan or expectations. I simply decided to play.

First assignment: Pick a celebrity. That was an easy one. I picked Emmy award - winning Hollywood actress Sela Ward. I had just finished reading a book she wrote titled "Homesick," a memoir about growing up in Mississippi. I too grew up in Mississippi and had similar feelings and emotions. My book, the one needing an endorsement, was similar. Certainly, Sela Ward would understand and support the book.

Now what? I decided to call my mother to tell her about my new project. Mother, it turns out, just happened to know, through Dad’s business dealings, a couple who lived in Meridian, Mississippi. Meridian is Sela’s hometown. “I’ll call Mary,” she said.

Mom (a first level contact for me and a relationship I have cultivated since birth...ha! ha!) took over. She made the call. Turns out Mary’s husband, Dad’s colleague, had served on a foundation board with Sela. He had contact information for Sela’s personal assistant. Two days later, Mom called me with her mailing address. Bingo!

I wrote and mailed a letter with the manuscript explaining my request and how I had obtained the contact information. Then I waited.

Turns out, my degrees of separation story doesn’t have the best ending. Sela did not meet the deadline.

About a month later with copies of my published book in hand, I was heading home to Mississippi for my first round of book tours. My phone rang. It was Sela’s Personal Assistant! She explained to me that Sela had been out of the country and never saw my request. She apologized profusely. I, the nobody with zero celebrity contacts, chatted for about ten minutes with Sela’s Personal Assistant!

The story here: I reached Sela Ward in four layers.

When thinking about the numbers and possibilities, I am blown away by the implications of who you can reach. What’s even more astonishing is that the power of your network is outside of your first layer. Layers you are not responsible to cultivate. Your job is to focus on your own inner network of up to 250 people. Plan to develop relationships over the long haul and always approach your network of friends and contacts as people you can help—not the other way around.

Now that you understand the power of your network, you’ll need a system to organize it all. I use Outlook Express to keep up with my addresses and contact information. However, there are also online systems that are most effective and designed for networking. One I use is www.LinkedIn.com. LinkedIn incorporates the degrees of separation and law of 250. Check it out.

If you want to join me in starting your own LinkedIn.com place, let me know. I would be honored to be in your network. It's easy and uncomplicated, which makes me like it even more.

If you haven't had a chance to read my juror story...my Amazon Short about being forewoman on a meth case...check it out. The shorts are 49 cents each. http://www.amazon.com/Ordinary - People - Perform - Unthinkable - Acts/dp/B000PAU32U/.

If you are a writer and want to know more about getting into the Shorts program, send me an email. I'll be more than happy to share with you what I know!

Reign on and Merry Christmas!!

Allyn Evans
www.allynevans.com
www.queenpower.com
www.allynevans.blogspot.com