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Allie Boniface

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Member Since: Aug, 2006

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Unnamed
by Allie Boniface → (All Poetry by Allie Boniface)
   Rated "PG13" by the Author.
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This is a true story...

I'd passed it a thousand times,
This bar by the fish factory where tuna filled the air.
Sully's, read the peeling sign.
I paused.
Then, his voice still ringing in my ears--
I'm sorry, I can't do it anymore--
I opened the door and stepped inside.
Cigar smoke choked me, blue lights blinded me.
The bouncer ran one hand down my arm and winked "Okay."
I slid past gyrating bodies, music from the red-orange jukebox
Shaking the floor beneath me.
Blondes jammed the bar, brunettes beside them,
A red-head here and there to mix it up.
"Whaddyawant?"
I stared, unsure.
He grinned, the bartender with toothpaste-white teeth,
Beefy arms and a broad, shirtless chest.
I shrugged.
He slid a cool brown bottle my way.
Beer bit my throat, warmed my veins,
Chased the metallic fear from my mouth.
I finished it and asked for another,
Ignoring the shoving bodies behind me,
Pungent with souring cologne.
"Last call!"
I didn't move.
And when everyone had gone,
He came from behind the bar,
Fed the jukebox some quarters,
And to Sinatra's smooth crooning
Took me in his arms and danced my tears away.
I never even knew his name.  

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 Reviews of "Unnamed"
Reviewed by Brittany Renée
Reviewed on November 8, 2006
Shocking end, actually. I liked this. Reminds me of Norah Jones.... I say this because Norah is so different, yet feeds still right into originality and classical (for her genre). I say this with you as well. Great poem.

Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader)
Reviewed on November 8, 2006
Hmmm, is this just half the story, He never bought you a drink.lol
Kewl descriptions, Uses most the senses to read.

Reviewed by Rusty Daily
Reviewed on November 7, 2006
Ditto the welcome to the den. Enjoyed your writing, looking forward to more.
Rusty

Reviewed by Joyce Bowling
Reviewed on November 7, 2006
I would like to take the time to welcome you to the den...your write was very descriptive, you transported me to the bar with you. I felt as though I were standing inside the crowded structure watching. I could smell the cigars and hear the music...my friend you have given the readers a great work to read. Again, welcome to the den and I look forward to reading more.
Blessings,
Joyce Bowling

Reviewed by Richard Cederberg
Reviewed on November 7, 2006
A riveting piece of flash fiction. Gotta love your mysterious admirer. And like Hitchcock ... you left much to the imagination. That I like! Welcome to Authors Den!

Light and Wisdom ...
Richard Lloyd Cederberg

Reviewed by Leysa Lowery
Reviewed on November 7, 2006
I loved every word -- so very descriptive. I could "see" and "smell" the bar and I got goosebumps when I read the final lines. Excellent.


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