Scars of redemption (Short Story) - 1/27/2018 10:20:05 AM
Extremely well written with that dual narrative in the beginning. And you have the psychology down with the way that Callie viewed the whole situation--far different than everyone trying to help her.
Horrifying ending but expected the way things were going for Callie.
Only one line bothered me: "… He pulled his hair back."
Ron
once visited always dwell (Short Story) - 8/12/2010 8:49:25 AM
A most interesting tale, TJ. You kept my attention throughout. Love and peace,
Regis
once visited always dwell (Short Story) - 5/23/2010 3:36:42 AM
very good story, and very well written. Keep up the good work.
a letter to GOD (Short Story) - 5/10/2010 3:24:28 AM
A good story, heart wreching. It touched my heart. you have a talent for writing, keep it up.
Power play (Poetry) - 5/16/2024 11:01:16 AM
It's terrible when someone tries to control us. Your poem conveys that terrible feeling very well.
Ron
Heard (Poetry) - 5/13/2024 11:16:31 AM
I am slipping into the silent world of deafness. It can be a blessing when one wants to go to sleep. However, the kindly AI of closed captioning is making me able to read with my still good eyesight almost everything that is said or required of me including criticism. I welcome criticism to either counter it, or accept it as a way of improving myself.
As you can see, your poem has given me a lot to think about and report here.
Ron
Life tires me no more. (Poetry) - 10/5/2021 9:19:49 AM
You really let out all of the hurt that has been plaguing you all these years. I'm glad that you seem to have found a kind of comfort. Great rhyming and word choice.
Ron
Life tires me no more. (Poetry) - 10/3/2021 2:03:47 PM
When we learnt o express our feelings on paper, we never tire of
expressing our lives . Thank you for sharing.
Sixth Sense (Poetry) - 5/25/2021 8:05:36 AM
I firmly agree, oppressors usually come to a bad end.
Ron
Moments, memories, hope and faith (Poetry) - 6/23/2020 10:41:56 AM
Figments of life nicely captured in poetry. Good work. But it's dominoes that fall, not domino's. As far as I know, we own dominoes, but dominoes do not possess anything except perhaps the ability to fall over in line if we set them up that way.
Ron
Life in the ICU (Poetry) - 4/22/2020 8:08:24 PM
One can only imagine what goes on in times of war and in the face of an invisible enemy. Shockingly good poetry!
Life in the ICU (Poetry) - 4/16/2020 11:04:30 AM
Reads like someone who has been there watching the machines. They save lives, but sometimes can prolong the inevitable. My dad's case, four months.
From my view, being in ICU after surgery to "scrape off chunky junk from my right lung in 2012, I didn't feel much of anything while recovering very fast for about four days. When I started feeling things, I was moved to a regular hospital bed, ready to go home, but detained for another seven or eight days so that the hospital could collect the insurance for keeping me there.
If the surgery had not saved me, and I died, I doubt if I would have felt anything up until they pulled the plug. The drugs are that good… Mostly morphine.
Ron
Life in the ICU (Poetry) - 4/12/2020 1:17:20 PM
The reality is that some will live, and some will die. Death is a destiny for everyone. If I should die tomorrow, I won't regret it, for I have lived long enough and I will make room for the newcomers to this world.
Sandie
Life in the ICU (Poetry) - 4/12/2020 11:37:29 AM
Those that leave, sometimes prematurely, are the lucky ones...-e-
Shatter (Poetry) - 4/9/2020 11:20:47 AM
I don't know why others have not commented. This metaphorical description of the roles we play in life, sometimes under great distress, is the epitome of what poetry should be. I feel badly that you may be trapped by your religious extremist regime. At least, through your poetry and other work, you may be able to get beyond what binds you where you're at.
And, congratulations! Doctor!
Ron
Scalded Tongue (Poetry) - 1/10/2019 12:07:18 PM
Your are spot on about uncontrolled tongues. Well penned. I believe we should have freedom of speech but we also need to weigh our words.
Scalded Tongue (Poetry) - 10/25/2018 12:15:37 PM
I believe a scalded tongue would save many people in politics from their mistakes.
Scalded Tongue (Poetry) - 10/21/2018 2:48:15 PM
When there's no scalded tongue to speak, there's always the paper and pen. A writer has to speak his/her mind, and no writers should be silenced by another.
Your poem speaks volume of the pain you feel for not able to speak out or not wanting to speak out because for fear of consequence which shouldn't have been.
Sandie
Scalded Tongue (Poetry) - 10/21/2018 12:03:38 PM
Hah! I laughed at the last line. But the fourth stanza is certainly no laughng matter, as is the poem complete shackled with no scaled tongue to lash out with.
Climb (Poetry) - 8/5/2018 9:24:15 AM
Some have it easy, and some have a hard. But we all die. Your poem seems to cover something that has been very hard to swallow. I know a lot of times when I just want to turn off the torture, too. But not yet, most of the time, things are cool.
A very thought-provoking entry.
Ron
Climb (Poetry) - 8/4/2018 11:43:17 AM
A very heartfelt poem. Emotions well-expressed!
Sandie
Innocence (Poetry) - 7/21/2018 5:34:20 PM
Yes turbulent times already. Thought provoking pen.
Monsters In The Making (Poetry) - 5/31/2018 5:37:11 PM
Indifference can create monsters. We all suffer from it.
Innocence (Poetry) - 5/30/2018 4:24:36 PM
Watch out little ones. The world is about to turn upside down.
Sandie
Innocence (Poetry) - 5/30/2018 9:51:06 AM
I like the prophetic tone of this one. It seems we are entering on some very difficult times for our children of today. They will have to solve problems that we have exacerbated by either unknowing evil action or inaction… Take your pick.
If what is projected comes true, our children and grandchildren will have to learn quickly and act fast.
Ron
Press Pause (Poetry) - 5/26/2018 2:03:43 PM
I don't believe I've ever read a more beautiful and realistic Mother's Day poem before. Thank you for sharing your intimate thoughts about your wife as the mother of your children.
Ron
Press Pause (Poetry) - 5/26/2018 12:46:39 PM
There are so many precious feelings and passion well-expressed in this poem about your dear mother. This has brought back some memories for me when I was a teenager my room was a mess and my mom would tidy it up for me, then I would get mad when I couldn't find something that I need to wear. Your poem made me think about my mother and I'm missing her all the more.
Good poem and well-express of your love for your mom!
Sandie
Black tagged (Poetry) - 4/2/2018 6:09:25 AM
This piece of fine writing leaves the reader with much to ponder, and reflect upon.
Black tagged (Poetry) - 4/2/2018 5:45:21 AM
I hope you get many reviews for this stunning piece of workmanship. The subject is very dark in dire but the way you write it is very realistic and meaningful with many metaphors so eloquently done.
Ron
Bachelor (Poetry) - 1/26/2018 8:30:43 AM
It is interesting how social pressures applied by families and friends when it comes to marriage. But some of us choose not to fall into that trap. And some of us may never marry at all.
I only hope that in the future, without children, you don't come to regret that you didn't have a family of your own. I think about what could have happened, but didn't. Still I'm comfortable with not having children. There are certainly nieces and nephews enough for me to spoil.
Ron
Bachelor (Poetry) - 1/26/2018 7:26:24 AM
Amen! Live your life according to your soul!
Peace love and light
Amber
Bachelor (Poetry) - 1/25/2018 4:07:25 PM
Well written, heartfelt poetic song. Should make the Top Ten to #1.
Shadow of my past life (Poetry) - 10/12/2017 8:52:49 AM
"Sick of dotting my i’s and crossing my t’s" ... but what about ~ Its time I colored... It(')s LOLOL.
Stunningly raw and real poem. The candid emotions are like a punch in the readers gut.
I guess self-loving care and acceptance for being human. We all have those two hungry wolves.
Shadow of my past life (Poetry) - 8/20/2017 4:09:04 PM
Well expressed sediments in poetic fashion. Hurt people hurt others. It must stop with someone and begin with peace, understanding, and love. Amen!
Shadow of my past life (Poetry) - 8/20/2017 2:41:54 PM
We can't always hide our inner selves. eventually everyone gets to know the real you.
Shadow of my past life (Poetry) - 8/20/2017 7:49:40 AM
Certainly poetry helps us clear our minds of our own evil deeds even more so than simply writing prose.
Ron
Shadow of my past life (Poetry) - 8/20/2017 3:17:12 AM
ISN'T IT GOOD TO KNOW THAT 'WE'RE 'ALWAYS ON HIS MIND'...THAT THERE'S NOTHING WE ARE FACING(PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY, EMOTIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY)'HE' IS NOT AWARE OF? WE CAN GO FORWARD WITH 'THE PEACE OF GOD' THAT IS OURS! EVERYTHING THAT WE NEED 'FOR THIS MOMENT' IN OUR LIVES, WE'VE BEEN GIVEN! THIS DAY AND ALL THE DAYS OF YOUR LIFE 'YOU CAN...WE WILL' CLIMB EVERY MOUNTING, WITH A DETERMINATION THAT SAYS, 'I'M PRESSING ON...I'M IN HIS HANDS'! JOURNEY ON!!! THANKS FOR SHARING, LOVED THIS WORK. LOVE, BLESSINGS AND FAITH...JOYCE * HIS INSPIRATIONS
Father Daughter Dance (Poetry) - 9/16/2016 7:40:03 AM
A lovely poem that awakens thoughts and emotions, TeeJay. Thank you for sharing it. Love and peace.
Regis
Cleansed (Poetry) - 8/4/2016 9:59:13 AM
So many children have experienced abuse like that. Fortunately, not all come to the violent conclusion you share in this poem. For those that do, it's a cycle of violence that runs in families as though it were genetic.
Ron
Turn off your mind (Poetry) - 8/6/2015 3:31:27 PM
interesting poem ... good vibes on future creative endeavors ...
Turn off your mind (Poetry) - 6/30/2015 6:56:54 AM
Very disturbing and sad. I wonder what experience brought this poem to life.
Ron
Turn off your mind (Poetry) - 6/30/2015 4:25:07 AM
Insomnia. An old friend who likes to play upon the eyelids of the nicest people!
Turn off your mind (Poetry) - 6/29/2015 4:37:00 PM
I can relate to "her." I know how she feels and what she's going through. A meaningful and moving poem, TeeJay. Love and peace to you,
Regis
Turn off your mind (Poetry) - 6/29/2015 3:59:20 PM
A thinking kind of a poem, giving the reader hope in the mother's song, and despair in the awakened child who sings her own self.
Verbal Duel (Poetry) - 6/14/2015 6:16:16 AM
There is always a tension between father and son. Especially when sons reach puberty and try to become men. Fathers who have not grown up yet have the most difficult time with their sons.
You've written something to think about on Father's Day.
Ron
Verbal Duel (Poetry) - 6/13/2015 2:40:47 PM
Substance to reflect upon for sure. Love and peace,
Regis
Murderer (Poetry) - 1/11/2015 6:36:36 AM
Beautiful sentiments but we cannot be everywhere to save everyone. Thought provoking pen.
Murderer (Poetry) - 12/19/2014 10:15:46 AM
A very telling and poignant poem. When we let the territorial imperative take over and justify it with some religious doctrine, war tends to take place. It always seems to have been justifiable to kill innocent men, women and children when at war, as though it were some release from the murder that it really is. When humankind finally realizes that war is nothing more than murder… mass murder, stupidly justified, this kind of killing will stop. Hopefully, this century will see the end to war.
Ron
Murderer (Poetry) - 12/17/2014 1:09:52 PM
Stark, harsh, real, and very sad... This world is indeed a mess. Thank you for sharing this poignant and meaningful poem, TeeJay. Love and peace to you,
Regis
Banshee (Poetry) - 11/10/2014 8:48:29 AM
This is quite the character that you have introduced to your readers through your verses, TeeJay. Well done! Love and peace to you,
Regis
Banshee (Poetry) - 11/10/2014 8:27:42 AM
Stories like this certainly will scare the kiddies a bit. I've known a few real-life banshees and there a b*t*h to deal with! ;-)
Ron
Whipped (Poetry) - 10/23/2014 11:19:34 AM
Today we are all wage slaves unless we are part of the top 20% and losing all the time. We feel the cat of nine tails as our debts pile up, there is no work that pays enough to survive, and we have to resort to almost anything, just to live.
Yes, the capitalists have won, and in doing so, they have enslaved the rest of us.
Ron
Whipped (Poetry) - 10/23/2014 9:45:43 AM
Your verses (and what they express) have given me pause for thought, TeeJay. Thank you for sharing. Love and peace to you,
Regis
Daddy Adieu! (Poetry) - 10/18/2013 7:57:22 AM
So much sadness and regret.
Ron
Daddy Adieu! (Poetry) - 10/18/2013 2:07:52 AM
a very deep write
budd
Monsters In The Making (Poetry) - 10/17/2013 3:28:43 PM
You words give the reader much to reflect upon. Thank you for sharing, TJ. Love and best wishes,
Regis
Daddy Adieu! (Poetry) - 10/17/2013 3:27:02 PM
A most compelling and expressive write that could be a song of sorrow and missed opportunities. Thank you for sharing, TJ. Love and peace to you,
Regis
Monsters In The Making (Poetry) - 6/22/2013 12:48:07 PM
We sure are… A bunch of spoiled brats. If it ever comes down to survival, we'll eat each other alive.
Cool poem. Could be a song
Ron
