THE CLIENT (Short Story) - 1/26/2014 8:08:45 AM
Nice twist. Either this is another ghost story or the killer got the wrong victim. Your writing has the feel of an old paperback PI novel and a B movie. I like that. You have a great way with character development and descriptive nuance.
A couple of suggestions:
"crossed" her face. The ragged "toenail" sticking… Probably can ditch the periods in PI.
Ron
THE CLIENT (Short Story) - 1/25/2014 11:17:52 AM
i hope you do continue with this character
budd
ERIC THE BOLD (Short Story) - 1/25/2014 10:29:04 AM
I really like the "twist" in the story. Unfortunately the Robin Hood/Gladiator/Conan part needs some serious editing and needs to be distanced from the traditional story I bit more. One thing I don't understand is why he would have created the ties to his leggings only "three months" before. A good editor could make it come to life as vivid as the dream it was.
Ron
ERIC THE BOLD (Short Story) - 1/25/2014 4:21:00 AM
to live in the dreams that take us away
budd
CANVAS AND COLORS (Poetry) - 1/27/2014 11:45:32 AM
That's why we paint over ugly graffiti with beautiful murals. The result of living life is love.
Ron
STONE RAMPARTS (Poetry) - 1/26/2014 12:19:37 PM
It's sad, but I'd say it's accurate about many people.
Sometimes the walls face one side, while we feel free to be unprotected on the other sides.
Thought-provoking!
Connie
Jackson Hole Cowboy (Poetry) - 1/26/2014 12:17:38 PM
I believe it. That means it's good.
I most often write in rhyme, which makes me admire those who write a good poem without rhyming. The picture's a good fit, too!
Welcome to Authors' Den...I hope you will enjoy the experience of being here.
Connie
STONE RAMPARTS (Poetry) - 1/25/2014 1:00:53 PM
An interesting and very true perspective. I've noticed that my older relatives are becoming more conservative in their old age. Piling up those layers of protection that they didn't have their carefree youth.
Ron
STONE RAMPARTS (Poetry) - 1/25/2014 11:16:08 AM
so true, welcome to the den
budd
Jackson Hole Cowboy (Poetry) - 1/25/2014 8:24:25 AM
How do:
I really enjoyed this. Here's hoping all is well at your camp.
Buffle Canard
A GENTLE AFFAIR (Poetry) - 1/24/2014 4:38:12 PM
Should have snapped at the title, but I didn't and you wove a sensuous journey to the surprising ending.
Jackson Hole Cowboy (Poetry) - 1/24/2014 4:36:55 PM
There are a few like you. Those who sleeping at a campfire with a horse tethered close by thinking off a golden haired woman he was too bashful to speak to.
