Kipp The Kid (Book) - 1/12/2015 10:50:15 AM
Like ur short on Kipp & Nip & Jane, I was reminded of a another kid I knew when I was in my teens, his parents called him Kippy, aparently to distinguish him from his father who he shared the name, Fred, with...I will have to look at the other shorts you got up when time allows it...-e-
An Amber Storm From Hell (Short Story) - 11/29/2014 12:26:25 PM
Thanks Ron for your input. I have put up longer selections, but people like to read shorter pieces unless they are already familiar with the author. Rovers appears in many science fiction books. They are usually manned in such books. The tiny unmanned rovers of today have sort of hijacked the name. But, because I take your point that most people might think of these little rovers when they read the book, I may change it to MEV (Mars Exploration Vehincle) or something similar. As to the shock wave, there is enough atmosphere on Mars to produce such a shock wave in my view. It depends on what is exploding and when you find out in the book what it is, it seems believable that a great shockwave could do what is described. Of course, as authors, as you are no doubt aware, we do take some factual liberties with our stories. Having never been to Mars, I can still write about what might happen there just as much as in the absence of an actual event on Mars like this being recorded I can safely fiddle with the facts and let my imagination take over. :)
You always give good feedback btw. :)
An Amber Storm From Hell (Short Story) - 11/29/2014 10:41:06 AM
A nice teaser, but it would be nicer if you would allow more of the story, perhaps a chapter, like I have done, to be revealed here.
Couple of suggestions: rover is a name given to unmanned explorers that are on Mars right now. This people transport that you describe here, perhaps should have a different name. Finally, since Mars as a very thin atmosphere, and the occupants of the vehicle were enclosed in a airtight enclosure or wore suits to protect them from the thin air, it is doubtful, even on earth, that one could hear a shock wave coming.
Ron
Children of Mars (Short Story) - 11/19/2014 8:28:45 AM
From this brief reading, it appears that you are writing about earthly children troubles in a Mars setting. Somehow, I prefer Huckleberry Finn. But I'm sure as the story develops, Deni's problems will be solved.
The danger about writing science fiction about other planets is getting the science all wrong. I know, because I do it. I realize that the gravity on Mars would enable some very interesting gymnastic abilities (like already experienced on the moon), but I don't believe that a glide suit like seen on earth, would work any better on Mars because the atmosphere that a guide suit uses would be much thinner and therefore, provide less lift.
Also, children that are raised on Mars from parents that were evolved to live in Earth's gravity, would have to have an earthlike environment to grow up in or their muscles and bones would be greatly compromised. This problem will vex us for some time, so I don't think that long-term living on the surface of any planets or moons, unless they are the approximate size of Earth, will be a very good idea until we evolve into humans adapted to environments like Mars… Perhaps through genetic engineering.
Ron
Why I Stopped Caring and Learned to Love my Books (Article) - 12/10/2014 11:19:10 AM
I totally agree with you. Since I retired I have devoted a great deal of time to other writers asking for little or no pay. They seem to have a great deal of difficulty returning the favors, even reading and reviewing my work at all. I just finished eight months rewriting line for line a book for someone who won't even return my emails now. My writing certainly has suffered, although I have learned a few tricks about writing and have still been able to write a few short stories along the way.
I need to get back to my novels and quit spending so much time trying to help others. It's not selfishness to do that… Its literary survival. Thank you for prompting me to do it.
Ron
Bloody Blade (Poetry) - 3/5/2015 8:18:07 PM
i would have assumed they vanished "by the end of a bloody blade"
Bloody Blade (Poetry) - 2/5/2015 12:22:01 PM
Even with the alternate stanza, it's difficult to discern how the people vanished. Still, your poem gives one a sense of eerie regret.
Ron
Bloody Blade (Poetry) - 2/5/2015 10:47:26 AM
I like the alternate ending stanza. So then, there's no hope for humanity. Okay... just checking. :)
Bloody Blade (Poetry) - 2/5/2015 10:01:16 AM
I'll jump in here. Humanity has been beset by the sword since its inception.
Under a Proud Down Under Sky (Poetry) - 1/12/2015 10:43:11 AM
I just hope that Australia does not stop being patriotic to their flag like the US did...I mean everyone here loves their freedom and their flag, but right after 9/11 there was a deluge on flag stores that actually ran out of the product and since then people seem to forget to some degree...keep writing, Paul, this poem was extremely well written...-e-
Under a Proud Down Under Sky (Poetry) - 1/10/2015 10:06:54 PM
Well done Paul. Well done indeed. I predict that terrorist will eventually be tortured in a most insane way and kept alive only to wish they would be dead. Unfortunately, that's the only way this terrorist movement will go away. Amen
On the Dark Side of Lonely (Poetry) - 12/14/2014 4:39:26 PM
12-14-2014:
Only 2 Things To Dwell On Past:
Fond Memories...
Revenge Is Sweet...
Etal: If You Don't Let Go
Something,Someone Will For You...
TRASK...
On the Dark Side of Lonely (Poetry) - 12/14/2014 6:34:50 AM
Paul,
You have expressed so well the feelings of loneliness when one has lost their love one. Your words touches my heart. May God walk with you.
Love and blessings,
~Linda
In a Parallel World (Poetry) - 12/12/2014 12:12:52 PM
I love this as I can relate to the theme that you express. I have a poem posted here at AD titled, "Yearnings" which expresses a similar theme; also, "The Death of Beth." Thank you for sharing Paul; much enjoyed. Love and peace,
Regis
On the Dark Side of Lonely (Poetry) - 12/12/2014 12:08:57 PM
This is very much my kind of writing; your verses awaken thoughts and emotions. Thank you for sharing, Paul. Love and peace to you,
Regis
On the Dark Side of Lonely (Poetry) - 12/10/2014 11:30:30 PM
I marvel at your poem's strength of emotions
and...am humbled by your fading memories
of a love...now gone....It is an amazing poem.
Thank you Paul, for sharing your verse.
On the Dark Side of Lonely (Poetry) - 12/10/2014 12:05:46 PM
In the garden of lost love you have written a very telling memory.
Ron
The Sleeping Giant (Poetry) - 11/26/2014 8:51:43 AM
Why am I thinking of Arnold Schwarzenegger?
This tale in a poem could have a better ending. But then, it's probably just an allegory of the old saying, "Let sleeping dogs lie. The little hunters are probably fleas.
Ron
The Unforgiving Sea (Poetry) - 11/22/2014 2:58:22 PM
...feeling lost and alone...that's the cruel irony,
sometimes all you need is...to be alone...get
a little free space...being yourself...finding your
way...you need to be a little lost first to find
the missing part...you're looking for and grow
beyond it...An inspiring poem!
Thank you Paul, for sharing your writing
and God Bless!
The Unforgiving Sea (Poetry) - 11/19/2014 9:56:13 AM
The poem certainly has a hopelessness about it, most probably caused by the action of the person in emotional pain. I can feel it, and that's all a poet can ask.
Ron
The Unforgiving Sea (Poetry) - 11/18/2014 2:48:40 PM
I've drowned in the sea that was unforgiving too - and it doesn't seem to want to let me go - but I let it go! Fantastic write here, Paul.
The Unforgiving Sea (Poetry) - 11/18/2014 12:58:17 PM
Scary poem. Don't want to loose my soul. Don't want to drown in the sea. But if I had a dream like that I would wonder, "What is this dream telling me?"
The Unforgiving Sea (Poetry) - 11/18/2014 8:32:13 AM
I had a horrible dream last night myself. They sure can prey on you the next day and even further.
The Unforgiving Sea (Poetry) - 11/18/2014 7:13:40 AM
I think I have drowned in that same sea a time or two myself...-e-
I Am a Song (Poetry) - 11/15/2014 9:51:45 AM
You are a story
that pens were meant to reveal
Your story is a song
to be sung by all.
Enjoyed every word.
I Am a Song (Poetry) - 11/14/2014 3:32:48 PM
I do hope love finds you = u seem like you'd have lots to give to that special gal. Keep looking - I know you'll be happier sooner than later.
I Am a Song (Poetry) - 11/14/2014 9:11:37 AM
You are a poem, written to be read. Most creative and enlightening. Thoroughly enjoyed.
Ron
