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Lonnie Hicks

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     Breathing Deeply: Chapter Two

She took my hand

grasped it

even carressed it

and I looked at her;

so many feelings in those eyes

contradictory ones

standing at the balcony.

And she said

"I hope you don't think me too bold;

too close

too soon.

But I have need of a kind person

and you seem to be that person

for whatever reason;

you soul came through to me

and I trust you

trust you, implicitedly;

and I have need of your protection."

"Protection?" I said

"Protection from what?"

"I have those near me who would

do me harm, do my family harm

and I am afraid, terrified."

I looked around looking for
who was near she could be
referring to; whom she feared.

But suddenly,
at once

a man came close and addressed her

"You have to come now."

he said.

"Immediately."

I reached out and stood between him and her.

"Do you know this fellow" I said.
"No," she said
"But I'd better do as he says."

With that she moves off with him
looking back at me, being guided by him through the crowd.


She looked back
mournfully in my direction
and I froze, but decided after a moment
to keep her in sight, following them both.

But, I lost her, leaving me indecisive

clawing at the spot where she disappeared.

Quickly, I moved toward the exits

to see if I could spot her getting into a car

to see if I can get a liscence plate
and maybe trace her from there;

she whom I did not even know her name,

or even how see came to be at this party.

I moved toward the door, standing nearby

the car pool, waiting, waiting to get a glimpse of her.

Waiting.

Suddenly from behind me a car sped by,

on the way out, speeding past me.

I could only see part of it's plate, the last three letters
QED
seeing her white gown in the rear view mirror,

and she was gone.

I turned quickly back inside to talk to the host

to get more information about her, 

who invited her, 

who were her friends.
I looked for him.

to be continued





 

 

 

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Reviewed by m j hollingshead 7/10/2018


off to read 3!



NEVER stop writing!

m
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 6/27/2018
Certainly, an exciting encounter. For some reason, I don't remember the first chapter. She seems to be in deep trouble and in need of, "a kind person." This makes me think that this story is a memoir, but you have it labeled action/thriller so that would make it fiction.

Ron
Reviewed by Sandie May Joyce (Sandie Angel) 6/26/2018
This is a beginning of a story which I suppose will be continuing. Good job in building up the suspense.

Sandie
Reviewed by Eva Pasco 6/26/2018
Intriguing!

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