I have to go with C. Lee McKenzie on this one when I say this, you got a strong write here. You should make this one at least about three pages longer. Expand the paragraphs, it is very descriptive but you need to make them a little longer. It is a very human story, and that is the kind I seem to relate to in the sense of the way it is written. Very relatable characters with this one.
Well, I like it. It's a piece of the bigger story--a slice out of a day on duty. Have you considered putting it into a larger context? Say a novella with a diary entry format. It is most assuredly true that when you write about what you know or love, the writing is strong.
When I wrote ths book in 2000, I was concerned about children having access to the Internet and to chat rooms where "you can be anyone you want." Here we are many years later and the situation with children talking freely to stangers on the Internet
Jason Donovan has a secret.
The Clere's Restaurant's drama has been unfolding in front of his eyes. If he can see it, so can the restaurant's other guests. But there's something the servers aren't telling him, and he will get to the bottom o
The fifth and final book of the Jade Owl Legacy sees a full battle for life as we know it. The world is threatened by the denizens of the Jade Village leading the China Hans through a fantastical world and to a conclusive battle.
