
Nahjaad writing. Ali has been gone for the day, so I can write in my private journal while I can, while he is not here.
Things continue to be very bad for me. I have to do the cooking/cleaning and make sure that I do not let anybody in my house; I don't know if they are spies or if they are friends of my husband. I have to be extremely careful.
If I don't do my husband's bidding, I will be beaten. Severely. The last time I disappointed him, he tried to break my arm when striking me with a heavy object. Luckily, I got away, but my arm was badly bruised; it has just now healed. The ugly black mark is all but gone: there's just a little trace of it left.
I don't know why I cannot be a little girl. I am only eight years old. A little girl should not be responsible for keeping house or keeping her "husband" entertained and happy. I should be running around with my friends and attending school!
I am way too young to be married!
I wish I could just run away and leave Ali. To me, he's no husband. He's a monster with human skin! I could try to run away, but he would ultimately find me and then I would regret what I have done with every inch of my life.
I would have worse things than a severe beating coming to me. Disfigurement? Hands or fingers being cut off? Death??
I would not put it past him if he tried to harm me in some evil way if I even attempted to escape. So I must do what I am asked to save me from further punishment or dishonor, not only from Ali, but from my family.
I must go: I feel as if eyes are peering at me. Ali also must be on his way home. I will write in here again; until later, this is Nahjaad saying goodbye! Please say some prayers for me. I could really use a miracle in my life! My life is horrible at best!
~Nahjaad. :(
*to be continued.*