Louisiana writes about their 12-year-old daughter, Deborah, who came to the family from Iran when she was eight years old.
Deborah is a child with serious and significant disabilities. She was born with spina bifida that left her lower half paralyzed; and she was also born without arms or hands. She also has severe asthma and other respiratory ills and is often on oxygen.
Deborah is one of those chlldren that, when you first see her, you can't help but to be drawn to her. She has a beautiful smile that lights up her dark face, and she is full of love and joy. Her courage is unmistakable, and once you get to know her, you soon find yourself forgetting about her disabilities.
Deborah came to us at the age of eight years, a small, scared, shy little one who had been kicked around once too many times in life as it were, and she also came to us suffering from heartwrenching physical disabilities that threatened to destroy her body, but not her spirit. Even as scared as she was, she still had spunk and determination inside that little broken body of hers, and she was bound and determined to overcome the cruelities that life had already dealt her.
Deborah was born in Tehran, Iran, and even from the start, it was apparent that she had serious physical problems. She was born without arms or hands, and she also was born with a sac at the base of her spine, which told the doctors one thing: she had been born with spina bifida, a serious birth defect resulting in partial, incomplete, or total paralysis of the lower limbs and clubfeet, in addition to other serious neurological problems.
She was also born with underdeveloped lungs, and had a lot of trouble breathing.
She was basically put aside by the doctors and nurses, and her parents, stunned at the news, basically left her to die. She was a throwaway, an unwanted child with a bleak and uncertain future.
She was placed into an orphanage, where she lived until age eight; but upon starting school, the teacher, a man, took one look at her, and sent her back home, in tears. It was reported that the teacher said to her, "You are ugly; go home. We don't need your kind here."
As you can probably imagine, Deborah (then known as "Bapsi") had a very low self esteem, and she spent her days hiding, so nobody would have to see her; and if they did, a good many people looked at her with disgust or revulsion on their faces, or they hit, kicked, or spit upon her.
When she was seven, she was put up for adoption; at the age of seven-and-a-half, she was then flown to America to be adopted, but nobody wanted a child with so many serious physical handicaps. That was when A.A.S.K. (Aid To The Adoption of Special Kids) phoned us about her; and of course, we said "Yes" immediately. Bapsi then joined our family; but upon doing so, we had a new name for her: "Deborah".
Upon seeing Deborah for the first time, we all cried, partly from pity for her disabilities; but mostly out of love and joy, and we took her in as our own. Granted, she was extremely shy at first, and when she did talk, she talked in Farsi, the language of the people in Iran. We didn't know any Farsi, but we did have a friend who was Iranian, and so she was an invaluable help to us by teaching us basic words in the Farsi tongue; and this was how we learned to communicate with our new daughter.
At first, Deborah could do but very little; but we then started working with her, teaching her how to use her hooks for something besides hitting people when they made her mad, and we also taught her English words, words like "Mama", "Daddy", "Home", and so forth. We enrolled her in a physical and occupational therapy program, and they worked with her, teaching her dressing and grooming skills, and how to manipulate objects with her hooks, which served as her hands. We also taught her how to hold a pen or pencil in her hooks and write her name, and how to hold a fork, knife, or spoon in her hooks, so she could feed herself. As she learned these new skills, she became more extroverted, and we found her to be a very happy child who loved life.
She also had breathing problems that required supplimental oxygen, and she was prone to pneumonia; but she was still determined to overcome her illnesses, and she knew not to overdo herself whenever she became winded or short of breath. We were very careful to monitor her breathing, and if she ever had any problems, we would take her to the E.R. for a breathing treatment, and then she would be okay--until the next time.
We knew that Deborah was a Shiite Muslim; we could hear her at night praying to Allah, her god, and she would pray up to five times a day. Because she was in a wheelchair and was paralyzed, she couldn't get down on her knees to pray to Allah, but she still prayed as best as she could. We learned of the Muslim faith, and we learned to feed her the foods that were not considered "tarif" (forbidden). We also learned of the Koran, and whenever we had any questions regarding her faith, she was more than happy to answer them. But then gradually, she started asking us about OUR religion, and soon, she was accepting our religion and beliefs; and she soon expressed a desire to accept God into her heart. Two years ago, she made that commitment, and she is now a shining vessel of the Lord; and she isn't afraid to proclaim her faith.
Deborah may have breathing problems, but she has a beautiful singing voice, high and breathy in nature, and sometimes at church, she will sing a solo. She is in the choir, and she loves church so much. She has really blossomed since accepting Jesus into her heart, and she now no longer wants to have anything to do with her former Muslim past, especially since the attacks on our country two years ago tomorrow. That day was especially trying for her, and she doesn't like to talk about her past, for fear that people will purposely try to hurt her. (There have been kids who have hit her or bitten her upon finding out that she is a former Muslim; and they have gone as far as calling her a "terrorist". Debby has a fragile self esteem as it is, and now she doesn't trust people, especially those of the Muslim faith, even though she was one herself prior to accepting Christ into her heart.) She also doesn't like to watch the news of the planes crashing into the Twin Towers or the towers burning and then collapsing nearly an hour later; she still suffers from nightmares about September 11, 2001, and she is scared for our country and its safety.
Debby has taught us much about acceptance of people of the Muslim faith, courage in light of severe physical handicaps that have left her a virtual prisoner of her own body, and about overcoming even the largest obstacles. She has also taught us the meaning of true love and joy, and this is why we find her American name so fitting, as her full name now is Deborah Bapsi Suzanne Joy Sandusky.
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Reviewed by serenety L
9/17/2003
I love this one about little Debby. Lucky child to have found such caring people taking care of her.
Love
Nico
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