At the breakfast time Mary, my wife, looked unusually silent.....
- .......morning, Charlie.
.... strangely absent-minded.
- Please, Mary, be careful ! You’re pouring the coffee on my newspaper and buttering my hand !!!
.....and rather nervous.
- Hurry up, Charlie. It’s late.
I began to be worried. Mary nibbled at a small piece of toast, then, with dreamy eyes, said excited:
- Charlie, I love, I love Michka. Oh, Michka, my darling.
I knitted my brows, troubled. I was tempted to ask her: - Who is Michka?”, but my courage failed. I only said, with feigned imperturbability:
- Ah, Michka.
Mary, smiling:
- I adore him, Charlie.
Then she added in a resolute tone :
- I want Michka. At any cost !
I had no time to go deep into the question because it was really late and my train was leaving.
I kissed Mary hastily and at last I went away.
/////
That was a painful day for me.
The ghost of Michka was drilling my brain. One thing was sure: Michka was a man, certainly a Russian, because Michka is a Russian name. I imagined him as a ballet dancer, a sort of Nureyev. Mary & Michka: what a lovely couple of sweethearts !
I shook my head, incredulous.
To tell the truth, I read my wife like a book: she’s a good housewife, an excellent cook – ah, her crepes suzette ! -, an adorable wife. But she’s incurably romantic and crazy about the love-stories.
At work, in the bank, the image of Mary and Michka miming the wedding dance of the grouse haunted me unrelentingly. I felt lost. Figures and bills danced before my eyes a frenetic saraband.
Rhino, my boss, - this and other nicknames of my colleagues are the result of the powerful imagination of my dear wife – threatened to dismiss me; at the canteen, lost im my thoughts, I asked for.....crepes suzette, but I got only a too underdone hamburger; when Cock, the cashier, smiling slyly, asked me: - Charlie, which exciting maid is breaking your heart ? “, I answered with passion: - I love Mary. I love my dear wife.”
Goose, the accountant, ex beauty queen, crushed me with a glare.
/////
I went back home tired, worried and, above all, jealous like Otello.
I heard clearly the voice of my wife.
- Oh, Michka, my love. Come here. Embrace me.
I felt I was exploding. I knocked at the door furiously.
Michka was looking at me with his black eyes, bright and....ferocious.
- But how ? He’s ......a bear !!!! - I stammered.
Mary, smiling, stroked the big pup.
- Michka is a fabulous pup, isn’t he ? A love at first sight ! Believe me, Charlie.
Then she added:
- Fancy now, Charlie. Michka cost me only $ 1000. It’s a real bargain.
- $ 1000 ?!!
My hair stood on end. Then I tried to calm myself.
- Listen to me, Mary......
Mary interrupted me, moaning:
- Charlie, why do you hate Michka ?
- Mary, my darling, why.....?
She prevented me from speaking.
- Stop it, Charlie. If you love me really, you must receive Michka with open arms. He’s my mascot.
Then she went to the kitchen escorted by the pup.
At table I wasn’t able to eat because Michka, impolite pup, devoured my beefsteak, licked greedily my vanilla ice-cream, upset beer and coca cola on my pants and, when I tried to kick him, threatened me grinding his teeth.
/////
A night full of anguish fell on me.
Michka, at the foot of our bed, was looking at me suspiciously.
- Good night, Mary – I said, depressed.
I tried to kiss her, but Michka began grunting.
- The brown bears are very jealous, Charlie.
She stroked the pup tenderly, then added in an encouraging tone:
- Cheer up, Charlie ! You’ll learn to love Michka, I’m sure of it. After all , he’s a good bear.
I woke with a start in the middle of the night, tortured by nightmares.
In the dark my hand fumbled for Mary guided by an unconscious need of help.
Horror!!!
My hand was touching lightly the bear’s fur. Suddenly I had the clear perception of the truth: Michka was lying down on our bed between Mary and me.
That beat everything ! I jumped our of bed, howling.
Fractured Frazzled Folk Fables and Fairy Farces is adult literature that satirizes famous children's stories, fables and fairy tales. The work is Jay Dubya's twenty-first e-book available in Amazon Kindle and Barnes and Noble Nook.
A naïve councilman and a down-on-her-luck single mom try to save their county’s last stand of forest from greedy developers and a dysfunctional government.
