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the drive home

 April, 2005

I am driving home from work today, the same way that I have driven my whole life, day after day.  The winter has caused my bones to age and I am so depressed because this life of mine is so stale and mundane, so empty. there is nothing new or fresh.

  I stop about half way home at the forest preserve.  In Chicago, the forest preserve is the only place to escape the madness of this crazy city life.  As I pull into the parking lot, I see a man on at the other side  foolishly trying to fly his kite ...difficult simply because there is not enough wind for lift as a matter of fact there is no wind today.

 Some children are playing by the lake waters edge as their mother watches while sitting on a near by picnic table.  I take two beers from the back seat of my car, slip them into my coat pockets so as not to be seen, close the door of my car and walk along the edge of the still brown winters grass towards the boat dock. My heart is still very heavy as I approach the pier.  I sit down at the end of the dock, Just at the waters edge.  take one beer from my coat pocket, open it and drink half of it in one quick gulp. I cross my legs and just stare across the lake for 5 minutes or so.  Of course all I hear are the sounds of cars rushing about in the not so far distance and an airplane flies overhead every minute or so...   I notice only for a minute though as my attention now begins to focus on a group of about 10  geese swimming in the waters not more then fifty feet from where I am sitting, they all suddenly begin to honk as if speaking to one another......tears begin to fill my eyes as a presence suddenly fills the air round about me....my attention now turns and focuses on the shoreline about a half mile or so in the far distance, then I notice the sound of the birds singing wonderful songs of praise.  loudly they chirp. It is so obvious to me that they are singing in anticipation of the soon coming spring, enjoying the bright sunshine as I.

on the other side of the lake I notice a single tree standing high above the tree line....wiping the tears from my blurring eyes, his peace begins to fill my heart......He has everything under control, and though I see through this glass darkly, His perspective is much higher then mine.....He sees it all from far above the mundane. I?

I can not see the forest from all of those trees.  I focus my eyes and try with all of my might to see it, but I can't seem to see past those trees.

You oh Lord are so far above me!  You are the awesome one... you hold me...you shelter me... you comfort me. 

I sit in the stillness of his presence, for some time.  The sun begins to slip over the horizon down back behind the trees, darkness begins to fall.   I stand and slowly stroll back across  the once dead Winter grass, hmm, I suddenly to notice a tint of green. The parking lot is empty now, not a soul around.

 As I open the door of my car.  The second full can of beer slips from my coat pocket, falls to the ground and rolls under the car.    I smile and I say  to myself,  "I think he heard my prayer!"

                                                         "I think he did."

                                      "thank you "friend" for your kind words today!"