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If God Loves These Kids, Then Why Must They Suffer? (By Bill Sandusky, Adoptive Parent To Children With Special Needs) by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
Saturday, July 10, 2004
Rated "G" by the Author.
Bill Sandusky talks about some of the things that some of his children (and other family members) have had to go through in their lives.
I wonder why things happen the way they do. I mean, it says in the Bible that "God never gives us more than what we are able to bear"; yet, when I see some of the things that some of my kids have had to endure in their young lives, I wonder if He even cares.
Take for instance, my son, Johnny, who is now 11 1/2. He has Duchenne's muscular dystrophy and other serious health problems. He has nearly died more times than I would like to admit, and it's a wonder my hair isn't totally grey from all the scares that this brave young man has given me over the years! Or my daughter, Ronee', who is also 11 1/2 and has JRA, asthma, and allergies. She, like her brother, has had to endure so many crises involving her health, and both have nearly entered death's door more than once in their young lives. Yet they somehow manage to beat the odds (AGAIN!), and they are still alive and flourishing and are (for the most part) doing quite well for themselves.
Or my daughter, Jodie, who is about to beome a teenager tomorrow (tomorrow is her 13th birthday). Jodie has severe spastic quadriplegic cerebral palsy and is profoundly mentally disabled; yet, she is finally learning how to express herself and is growing into a beautiful young lady. She has nearly died several times in her own life, thanks to several rounds of frightening respiratory crises that threatened to snuff out her young life!
I don't know why things happen, but God has had a Firm Hand on these three children, and He has seen them through some of the worst things imaginable. Our other children have also had things happen, and yet despite things like abuse, divorce, abandonment, change of country and culture, and the realization of joining another family other than their own, they have adapted well to their lives here in America, and have turned into well-adjusted, caring, capable children with a neverending capability for love and compassion.
I have seen many heartwrenching situations as a parent, such as the near-adoption of several children into our family (but for one thing or another, things fell through, and we lost custody of the children, and they went to other families instead), or the deaths of our own three biological children. We lost three children, a girl and two boys, and two died when they were still very young babies. The other boy died on the day he was to have been four years old; he died of complications resulting from spinal meningitis. Even though it has been over a dozen years ago since the last child, L'Acadia, died, I still miss them very much, and it still makes me cry whenever their birthdays or holidays like Easter or Christmas roll around. They could have had happy, productive lives; yet God decided to call them all Home; and they are now with Him, in Heaven, forever and ever.
I have also witnessed tragedy in my brother's family, such as the arrival of my niece, Cajun Marie, who was born severely disabled with multiple medical problems. She is now five, going on six, but she will never be more than a near-vegetable, unable to see, hear, or talk; and unable to do even the most basic things for herself. She is on total medical care, and caring for her and her needs is a full-time and difficult job. She has had many hospitalizations and "near-death experiences" herself, but she has proved to be a little fighter, and she, like our own children, continues in her own special way to flourish and beat the odds. (Cajun Marie is the second youngest child of my brother, Marvin, and his wife, Toni. They live in Memphis, Tennessee.)
I can only thank God for all the Miracles He has provided for our family. Even with all the heartbreak and tragedy we have had to face over the years, He has brought us through them with Grace and Mercy, and it is because of His Help that we have been made stronger and are able to cope when things go bad. We have had many Miracles in our family, not only in mine, per se, but also in the lives of my brothers Carl, Marvin, Jimmy (he is disabled as well; he is now in a nursing home, as Mom is now too sick to be able to care for him and his needs), John, Wayne, Doug, Charley, and Daniel. Through all the tragedies we have experienced, our families are closer now than ever, and so is my wife's family. She and her family have weathered some incredible tragedy and loss as well, but God has seen them through, and they have gotten victory and hope from our Lord and Saviour!
God MUST have big plans for not only my family, but also the families of my brothers, and also my wife's family members and THEIR offspring/spouses. I can't think of any better explanation than that except to say that even with all that we have had to endure, we are still plugging away, and the future has never looked brighter for the Sanduskys!
~Bill.
P.S.:
Case in point: My wife and myself recently became grandparents for the fifth and sixth time. Our oldest daughter, Lightning, gave birth to twin boys, Tyrell and Tyreese, on July 4, 2004, back in their Colorado home, and both boys and mama are doing splendidly! :) Both boys were premature, but they are both breathing on their own, without ANY help, and they are both about to be released from the hospital as soon as little Tyreese reaches his goal of five pounds! :)
there is a reason God allows suffering--i personally don't think it's Him, it's because of mankind's sin...we are all punished for it. being saved doesn't exclude us from difficult times, and it is especially poignant and heartbreaking when children suffer...all we can do is trust Him, and know that He is in control, and continually pray for guidance and wisdom in the midst of trial.
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I wonder why things happen the way they do. I mean, it says in the Bible that "God never gives us more than what we are able to bear"; yet, when I see some of the things that some of my kids have had to endure in their young lives, I wonder if He even cares.
