Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado, click
here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.
I Am So Relieved That You Aren't Mad At Me!: A Letter To Rebekkah From Johnny by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
Wednesday, January 5, 2005
Rated "G" by the Author.
Johnny emails his California friend after she wrote him a letter of encouragement.
Weds., January 5, 2005 (you owe me one; I have done two letters to you today!!)~
Dear Rebekkah~
Hi! I am so happy to konw that you aren't mad at me, but I was wondering because it's been a long time since I last heard from you. Now I know I was just being silly; I worry about the stupidest things...
I know I am more of a person than I think I am, but it is hard when people stare or make "comments" about my situation, or they exclude me just 'cause I am in a chair. I know I can't help what is going on with me, and I should learn to be grateful for what I HAVE and what I DON'T have; but I see changes in my abilities every day, and to tell you the truth, it scares the living hell outta' me. I don't want to die young; I want to have a happy, rewarding life, and I want to grow up enough to where I can go to high school and graduate, and maybe have the opportunity to go to college! I also want to get married and have a family of my own; but because of my health, I am afraid that I won't get to do any of these things unless God sees to it. He is the only way I can beat this thing, and He is the only way that can help me live longer than what doctors think I will (and I already have!!).
I don't mean to act all hateful and mean towards Ronee', but as I said in my last letter, it is hard to feel good when people are always saying how great she is, and there I am right in the same room when they say it! Don't they realize that they are only making me feel like a total yutz and that they are hurting my feelings? I don't like it when people "compare" me to Ronee', and I don't like it when they treat her like she's the Queen of England while I am a nobody! I get so mad at people when they do that I just want to hide or buzz their toes with my wheelchair! That ought to show them that I don't appreciate being treated like I am a nobody!! GRRR!! (Johnny says, hissing like a mad cat! LOL)
I hope you will pray for me. I have been having a tough time of it lately, and I have been feeling all scared and depressed. I guess it's because of the sunami disaster or the terrorists, I don't know; but I have NOT been a very nice kid lately, and it seems that any little thing can get me angry or upset! This isn't like me! I wonder if I am crazy?...
Then I go acting like everyone hates me or is mad at me when I KNOW they aren't; but what am I SUPPOSED to think when people treat me all shabby and mean like, and what am I SUPPOSED to think when I get the shaft while my sissie gets all the extra attention?? I guess it shows how stupid I have been acting lately! I hope you understand why I have been a total jerkules lately because I have NOT been at ALL nice!!
I am also worried about my maman going to help out the sunami victims. I am so scared that I will lose her while she is there, and then I will be left without a mommy to care for me. I guess that is another reason why I have been so stupid as of late; and I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me.
Well, I gotta' go; I have to have my bag changed, and I also have to take my meds and get my oxygen on and then go to bed. I have school tomorrow; we go back, and I am glad! I have been sooo bored here at home! Until next time I hear from you, take care, and God bless! Thanks for writing; now I can sleep better tonight, knowing that you aren't mad at me! That is a HUGE relief off my mind!!
Bye for now!
~Love, your pal, Johnn-0. :( :) (feeling sad still, but also feeling a little happier...)
Great Write. I understand how Johnny feels, I live in my younger sister's shadow. She is the strong, smart, capable one, and I am just "Sarah". Very well penned!!
it's hard when one sibling gets the praise and makes comments when the person feeling slighted is right there as the comments are made (don't we know it!). maybe johnny could talk to his parents, and he should DEFINATELY keep journaling and improving his attitude! a strong, educational, well written piece
The Harvest of Souls Crossover is a story that is exciting, vigorous, and full of suspense about the fight of good and evil in two realms, the light and dark world. The Howdy Family is determined to defeat the world of darkness, led by the seemingly
From the Caribbean Sea to Machu Picchu in Peru, and from birds to flowers and butterflies, Reflections and Treasured Wonders offers a collection of images gathered from around the world.
Weds., January 5, 2005 (you owe me one; I have done two letters to you today!!)~
