A woman with two newly adopted toddlers wants answers, so she writes to a woman who has a lot of parental experience and know-how.
Friday, February 11, 2005, 4:05 p.m.~
Dear Ms. Sandusky~
You don't know me, but I read your book, "A Family Made out of Rainbows and Miracles: The Sandusky Family Story--A True Story of Love and International Adoption", and I was compelled to write to you. So here goes.
Before I go on any further, my name is Bettina (Betty) Jo Ciagalore, and I live in a suburb of South Miami, Florida. I have two small children, both boys, named Erick Ryan (19 1/2 months) and 13-month-old Evan Robert, and I am raising them on my own. It isn't easy, especially since I am busy trying to find a job; but I have not had any success. Do you know how lucrative the job market is? It is next to impossible to find a job that doesn't pay minimum wage, and it is next to impossible to find a job that will fit my daily schedule.
I would put my boys in daycare, but I can't afford it, and until I can find a daycare center that I can afford, I can't look for a job. I also have to have my sick, elderly mother look after the boys while I am out job-hunting, and I am about ready to start crying or pull out my hair from the frustration I am currently feeling!
I read your book at my local library, and I was moved to tears; I don't know whether you have that much love in your heart or crazy; but I don't know how you manage to have a job and raise a family of that size! You have such a beautiful looking family, and you obviously know a thing or two when it comes to raising kids! I am just finding out what it is like, and my two boys wear me plumb out: by the end of the day I am so tired I don't know whether I am coming or going, and I am on the verge of collapse! I was wondering if you could offer me some helpful "tidbits" or advice about raising small children, and I was wondering if I am crazy for adopting two boys at the same time! My boys are both from South America, and they are sweet, loving kids, but you know how active toddlers are, and you also know the expense (diapers, food, clothing, etc.). I am getting used to the demands of small children (SLOWLY!), but those two boys take up my time, and the only time I am really "free" is when they are in bed or if I am out job-hunting and my mother is watching out over them; but I feel like such a fool. My mother has emphysema and is on supplimental oxygen; yet she is more than happy to watch her grandsons; but I feel like such a lurch for having her watch them when her health is so bad; but what is a young mother looking for meaningful work to do? I can't just stick Evan or Erick into daycare; daycare is expensive, and I am busy trying to find a job so I can provide for my boys!
please write back to me; I would really love some advice on how to raise more than one child, and I would love to know what you do to keep your sanity. I also would like to know if there is a better way than for me to have my sick mother watch my sons while I am searching for gainful employment and also how to deal with cranky toddlers when I am not in the mood! Any advice or suggestions is greatly appreciated! Thanks!
Sincerely yours, Betty Jo Ciagalore in South Miami, Florida. (My friends call me "B.J.")
When Kathy finds a small stray kitten some amazing things happen. Story's from a Mom's view of the love, caring and patience needed when a child wants to own a pet. Recipient of the prestigious Mom's Choice Award. Delightful illustrations!
You May Be Single, But You’re Not Alone.
Being a great dad is challenging enough when you’re part of a two-person team. But now you’re raising your kids single-handedly. How can you provide the emotional, physical, and spiritual support your
When Kathy finds a small stray kitten some amazing things happen. Story's from a Mom's view of the love, caring and patience needed when a child wants to own a pet. Recipient of the prestigious Mom's Choice Award. Delightful illustrations!
Friday, February 11, 2005, 4:05 p.m.~
