Sikik Eegeesiak, Louisiana Sandusky's Inuk friend in far off Barrow, Alaska, writes, to share some news with her. She is very depressed at what the medical test results showed. She has discovered that she now has multiple sclerosis.
Friday, October 7, 2005, Alaska Time, Barrow, Alaska~
Dear Louisiana In Tennessee~
Remember when I wrote last time, and I would let you know as soon as I found out anything about the recent medical testing I have had? Well, the results came in last week, and I am afraid that the news isn't all that good. Seems that I have multiple sclerosis, and it has affected my balance and my vision at times. That was why I was having trouble with my walking and why my vision has been fading in and out lately. Well, I have to take it easy and make sure that I get plenty of rest, and I also have to use a cane (or forearm crutches on my bad days) when I walk. On REALLY bad days, I have to use a wheelchair, like the one in the picture. When my eyes are bothering me, I have to lie down and rest them and hope that it clears up after I have done so.
As you can imagine, I am very depressed and scared because until recently, I have been very active, and now I am facing the prospect of disability and uncertainty. So if there are any mistakes in this letter, it's because I can't see what I am typing and my eyes are bothering me, so please do forgive me. My disease could get worse over time, but it may not; time will only tell. But I am wondering what is going to happen, and I hope I am not going to die in a few months; I am too young to be worrying about death and dying, and I still have so much of my life yet to live! So please keep me in your prayers; I really can use them!
I also have been wondering if it is because I have been seeing all-red auroras lately; maybe the spirits are giving me some kind of sign! I don't like seeing all-red auroras; they mean misfortune and death is soon to be on its way!! Maybe Mother and Father are mad at me about something, maybe the gods are mad at me; I dont't know, but lately my life hasn't been all that good, especially when it comes to my health!
The weather here is chilly and rainy, it does little to improve my sour mood. I am so sad all I want to do is lie in bed and feel sorry for myself! I have tried to be positive about all of this, but I see the stupid wheelchair in the corner (as well as the crutches), and I also see the cane, and it's like my life as I know it is over, and I can't deal with it right now!! I also see all the pills that I am on, and I am so frustrated all I want to do is open up the pill bottles and dump all the pills down the toilet! They give me weird side effects, and I don't like how they make me feel! I am so loopy and sleepy all of the time, and I have no appetite! But noooo, Dr. Doran wants me to be on all this stuff, so as to control my MS symptoms, and I wish I didn't have all this worry and bother! I DON'T like being sick, and I wish I had my health again!
Well, I am going to lie down again, my stupid eyes are bothering me angain, and I can't see waht in the hell I am typing, you know how that goes! I will write again when I hear from you; please write to me; I really can use some cheering up!
Love, your miseralbe Inuk friend, Sikik Grace Eegeesiak. :( >tears<
You express expertly the sufferings of daily existence for some. Makes the reader think, Karen. Merci mon amie. Amour et paix. Ton ami de la C-B, Canada.
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