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Dear Donna Oliver: Louisiana Writes To A New Friend In Georgia... by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
Thursday, November 3, 2005
Rated "G" by the Author.
Louisiana writes to Donna Oliver in Smyrna, Georgia. Donna is the adoptive parent to ten children, most with special needs. She shares with her her own amazing adoption story.
Thursday, November 3, 2005, 11:40 a.m., C.S.T.~
Dear Donna Oliver~
I enjoyed reading your story that was featured in the latest newletter for AASK; your story sounds somewhat similar to mine! *Giggle* I had to write to you upon reading your fascinating story, and I thought I would share with you my own adoption story.
Bill and I had three children of our own in the later eighties, but sadly, all died, two while still tiny babies. We had a daughter (L'Acadia Marie-Antoinette) and two sons (Pierre Armand and Aron Jakob), and two died before they even reached a month old (and one--Pierre--) died when he was just about one week old due to SIDS. The other son (Aron) died of meningitis on what would have been his fourth birthday. Our only daughter was born premature, weighing just under one pound at birth, and she was just too small (and too sick) to be able to survive on her own. After we got over our grief (it took a very long while, but at least now we are able to talk about our children without breaking down; but we still get sad on their birthdates, deathdates, and around the holidays, particularly Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas); we made the decision to adopt. Whenever we are in Breaux Bridge, Louisiana, where they are buried, we make it a point to visit their graves and take them toys and flowers and pretty up their burial site. (They are buried next to one another.) Had our children lived today, they would be teenagers now, and there isn't a day that goes by when we DON'T think about them or miss them!
But as I said, we made the decision to adopt, not just any child, mind you, but children who were considered "hard-to-place" or "speical needs" because we feel that a child who is older than the age of two years, is part of a racial minority, or a child who is disabled or emotinally desturbed deserves a family just as much as a child who is deemed healthy. So we started with the paperwork, and several months later, a reputable adoption agency called to tell us about a baby boy in Germany who had been born prematurely and was in desperate need of a family after his birth mother died while giving birth to him. Just a short time later, another adoption agency called to tell us about a multi-racial baby girl about the same age as the boy who was also born prematurely, but she had severe respiratory problems and her survival at that time was doubtful. Of course, as you can imagine, we were elated. About a month later, the little boy (his name was originally Johannes, but we changed his name to Johnathon, or Johnny) came, and he fit in beautifully. Just one week after little Johnny came our daughter then joined us, and little Ronee' proved to be a challenge as well as a delight. She came wearing oxygen, and had a whole slew of medications to help her breathing, but it wasn't uncommon for her to be taken to a nearby emergency room, fighting for each and every breath. It was a parent's worst nightmare, but somehow, despite all the odds, Ronee' survived, and she soon blossomed into a beautiful little toddler with a quick mind.
So now we went from being childless to being the parents to two active toddlers, and they were nothing but a joy to us. But then tragedy struck: Johnny fell ill with what appeared to be a cold (but it turned out to be something much worse: he had bacterial meningitis, and by that evening, he was gravely ill), and not long after that, Ronee' was involved in a terrible MVA that left her in a coma and severely injured. For three long, uncertain months, we waited and prayed at our two little ones' bedside, and all we could do then was wait and hope for the best, that they would soon emerge from their comas.
Johnny and Ronee' have since recovered from this sad and scary chapter in their lives, I am glad to say, but they have had more experiences with their health than what most people go through in their entire lifetime, and yet all their problems (past and current) have NOT stopped them in the least little bit! They are now nearly thirteen years of age, and they are both gifted, talented, and personable young preteens with an insatiable appetite for life and for people. They live their lives for the Glory of God, and they live life to its very fullest, even with having serious health issues. (Johnny is dying of Duchenne's muscular dystrophy, and Ronee' has severe systemic juvenile rheumatoid arthritis, serious allergies to peanuts and bee sings, and asthma; but as she gets older, her asthma is FINALLY getting better (for the MOST part!].)
In addition to Johnny and Ronee', we also have adopted fifty one more children as of this writing: our kids range in age from one year on up to twenty-three, and I am now a grandmother to six beautiful children, five grandsons, and one granddaughter. Our children come from places like all over the United States of America, Canada, Mexico and Latin America, Africa, Europe, and Asia, but to us, they are still our children, and we treat them just as though they had been BORN to us! :) Most of our children, like Johnny and Ronee', have special needs, but they have all blossomed into beautiful young men and women. A lot of my kids are physically disabled, but several (Roberto, Jodie, Lightning, Todd) have mental disabilities as well, and we even have a child (Melizza) who is bi-polar/schitzophrenic, but treatment and medication have helped her tremendously, and she is now working at Wal*Mart and now has a place of her own, in which she shares with another sister; they live in an apartment complex for people with disabilities. (They live close by to us.) Our three newest children came just this year: a baby boy and an older girl from Sri Lanka (Arjun and Rani) and a little girl from Romania, who just came in August and has since fallen into our family routine beautifully (her name is Janica Kryzstina). We don't know if we will adopt any more children, but who knows WHAT God has up the pike for us!
(We also lost a foster daughter, Rachel, to AIDS, when she was two years old. I forgot to mention her. We also had two other foster daughters at the time, two sisters from Cambodia, but they went to a family in Fort Worth, Texas, and they still keep in touch with us today and have adapted to their new Texas home. Their names are Hanh Ly and Linn Chan, and they are fourteen and a half and five and a half respectively.)
We have been involved with this adoption community for a little over a year now, and we have met familes from all over the U.S. and Canada, and we have since formed lasting friendships with a lot of them. We have met some of these families in our community, and we talk to one another about the demands/rewards of parenting children with special needs, and we have a picnic once a year (usually in August), put on by the local chapter of AASK; and we always have a wonderful time just reminiescing and visiting and meeting new friends. We also help other families who havent' adopted children just yet with the process, and when we hear that a child has been adopted by a family, there is cause for great celebration and joy.
In addition to parenting a village LOL, helping out with the adoption community, and working (I am a charge nurse at a local hospital here in Nashville, Tennessee, where I happen to live), I also am a published author, and writing keeps me very busy as well. I have written three books ("A Family Made Out Of Miracles And Rainbows: The Sandusky Famkly Story--A True Story Of Love And International Adoption", a book about nursing, and the sequel to the first book--it just came out this year--, which is called "...And The Miracles Continue: The Sandusky Family Story, Continued"), and more books just may be in the works, the way things are looking now. Yet I wouldn't trade my busy life for all the money in the world: I love my job, and my husband and kids are everything this Cajun mama could have ever hoped (or asked) for! God has indeed blessed us beyond measure, and He keeps ON blessing us in so many unexpected ways!
So there you have MY story. Thank you for writing, Donna, and I do hope to hear from you again! God bless you and your beautiful family mightily, and all the best to you with your kids!
~Love, a new friend in Tennessee, Louisiana Mayrah Therese Sandusky (Mama to *53* Miracle Children!!). :D
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Reviewed by Tracey L. O' Very
11/4/2005
Karen This is a very heart touching letter. Both happy and sad. Wonderful! Totally enjoyed this.
Traceyxoox(c :)
Dearest Karen!
Yes, yes this is an absolutely beautiful story depicting the potential (and in cases, actual) depth of the human heart, spirit, and compassion!
Wow, if every family was proactive in helping the less fortunate little ones have a loving life and future .. then this world would truly be a beautiful place!
You have a beautiful mind Dear Karen ... keep creating such magic ... Love & Support
Suzie xoxox :-)
You always manage to flabberghast me with your being able to keep it all so together. Names , illnesses,cities, states, events etc on and on. You are amazing dear Karen!;-)Besides being so compassionate!
These letters are a great way to swap disability stories, tell about the lives of the less fortunate, and share them with the world. I learn new terms and gain more knowledge on the adoption of children with disabilities. Such compassion pours from your heart and pen. Thanks for the letter today, Karen Lynn!
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