Thurs., September 15, 2006, 10:09 a.m., D.S.T.~

Dear Louisiana~

I thank you for your beautiful letter of encouragement; it couldn't have come at a more appropriate time! It is so nice to know that so many people care!

Jackie and myself are both hanging in there. We both have our bad days as well as our good days. Some days we do pretty good, and on others, all we can do is think of Opri--and cry.

The house surely isn't the same without Opri. He was a joy, an absolute joy, and he hardly ever complained. He was one of the bravest youngsters we have ever had the pleasure of knowing (and raising), and I felt privileged, honored, to have been his mam. He gave me nearly fourteen years of unbridled joy, and my life has been made better because of him.

Monday, the 11th, marked not only the day America wqas attacked: it also would have been Opri's fourteenth birthday. That day was horrible for me. All I could do was think about his life and cry. It doesn't seem right for a mother to outlive her child! He should still be here; he didn't have to suffer like he did! He should have had a life full of good health and joy, not sicknes, uncertainty, and pain!!

Somebody should have come forward to give my son a new kidney, but nobody did!! Because of this, my son is dead, and nothing can ever bring him back to life!!

Excuse me while I wipe my eyes; I can't see; I am crying too damned hard---

Sorry about that, but this is how it has been for me. I think of Opri being gone, and I go crazy, completely crazy! Poor Jackie has been trying to be a big help to me, but she is hurting, too, and I am scared that she might want to kill herself. She often talks about joining Opri in the grave, and it scares the living hell out of me! I have already lost one child; I certainly don't need to lose another one!!

Please keep me (and Jackie) in your prayers! That is all I can ask!

Thank you!

Love, your next door neighbor, Maria Alana Johnson. :( >tears<