Joshuas life was brief . He went through so much and I have often wondered , "why" .It's so unfair for a little child or anyone else to have to suffer like he did!
In the summer of 1999, Joshua seemed better. He was more responsive and sometimes would smile when we spoke or played with him. He loved to listen to music. Sometimes I'd take him out side to let him feel the warmth of the sun or hear the
rustling of leaves as they tumbled about.He still had seizures. He could not turn himself and required
frequent repositioning.
One night when we were in bed, we heard a squealing noise.
It was coming from the living room. We both excitedly ran to Josh.
He was tring to talk to us.
He kept making the little noises. We were so happy! Any signs of progress were like a miracle to us.
The seizures coutinued as October arrived, becoming more frequent. He was more congested and required many hospitalizations. Hospice was called in and stayed with us through the holidays.
He seemed better in February, but as time progressed, he weakened. Rick and Jessica signed a D.N.R ( Do Not Recitate paper). The Doctor said there was no hope, nothing else could be done for him. It was just a matter of time. We all had to face the grim truth that he would not be with us much longer. Our hearts were breaking! How could we endure such pain? We prayed a lot.God was there to help us .
Once again Hospice came to give assistance and support. They were wonderful1 !
We all celebrated his second birthday on April eighth ,amazed and thankful he was still with us.
In May he was worse, as his condition deteriorated. On the night of May twenty fourth, his breathing was very labored, his skin pale and clammy. I sofly sang to him as I rocked him. I could feel life ebbing from his small body. I prayed for strength, I prayed for God to give him the peace he needed. He had suffered so much! I loved him enough to let him go. My tears wouldn't stop.
In the morning, I called his parents to let them know the end was near. Hospice was notified. Jessica came to stay with him while I went to a mandatory meeting at work.The Hospice nurse came and left at 1 pm when I did. At 2:10, Jessica called me. She was crying and hysterical! She said Josh had stopped breathing. I told her to call Hospice, and I'd be home as fast as I could get there!
When I got home, Josh's pale body was laying in his crib.He looked like he was asleep,but he wasn't breathing. Our Lord had taken him home! He had found peace and eternal salvation as one of Gods little angels. We held each other as we cried and cried.
MORE TO FOLLOW.........
I am so sorry but this little Angel is with his Father in Heaven and no more pain or suffering. You are a very strong and special person MaryGrace. Your family is blessed to have you dear.
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