Life After Death: A Mystic’s Journal Entries: November 16 - 19, 2006
Thursday, November 16
10 p.m.
At the doctor’s today, looking out the window - a tempest. Wind, water; grey. The park across, bare branches, a few firs; lawn. One tree at the rim of the park - sparse yellow leaves sprinkled across its uppermost branches, like glitter, confetti ... a small, fragile celebration within the tempest. And towards its base a bundle, a surprising sprig of bright yellow leaves fighting the winds, as though autumn had just begun, or the devas had fashioned a bouquet... Later JF called to say she had seen a double rainbow across the sky, almost spanning the town, after the storm ...
Still reacting to the shots. Could barely stand tonight; finally slept for some hours. Meanwhile, many miracles for others, more than ever. My Heart is so very open now, my Love and Compassion for all beings so very strong - including a Love and Compassion for all the doctors and nurses of the world. I see their kindness and their love, and their wish that I be well again, healed ...
Sunday, November 19
1:30 p.m.
A phone message on our machine from dear Ed. He simply said there was sad news about my mother.
I made myself some tea. M. said: "Call him. I want to know what the news is." I drank my tea. "Sad news" could mean two things: my mother was in the hospital, the thing she dreaded most - or she had left for other realms. I hoped it was the second, for her sake. I waited until I felt I could face either eventuality and then called him.
Mercifully, she had left for other realms.
5:20 p.m.
Errands, following the customary phone calls. I have been surrounded by tears since 1:30, but have not yet cried - save very briefly while waiting for M. at the grocery. I now have forgotten what train of thought I was following, but it must have been a sad one.
Mainly I feel a great relief, as though a tremendous burden and sadness has been lifted from me... The thoughts of my mother’s suffering and what the disease would eventually bring her now gone, forgotten, dissolved ...
Even as I called sad family and friends strewn over the East Coast and beyond - my mother was visiting her French relatives on the other side, in another realm - and she had already met Christ.
I clairvoyantly see my mother with many relatives, all seated around a long wooden table, drinking wine - a feast. My mother is gaily laughing... And young again. And inwardly I thank Christ and His Divine Mother for taking care of my human mother and my human family on earth.
Her happiness melts away my tears, at least for the moment. Clairvoyantly I also know that she has not yet seen friends nor my father. I have felt surrounded by her Presence and her love for many days now ... For weeks. That has not diminished with her passing. In fact, it has intensified. It more feels like the magic that surrounds a birth ...
Bon voyage ma chere mere ...
1:05 a.m.
The loving Presence that surrounds me has grown stronger as the hours have passed ... and the relief. JF on the phone: "You sound relieved. Strong." Called R. a bit after 10 p.m.- she answered on the first ring. We spoke of my childhood, my parents, my mother. R.: she would never forget the first time she saw my mother: a broad-rimmed hat, pedal pushers, looking as though she was in Vogue Magazine - working in the garden.
R. also said that a young man had visited her for a few days, down from Nova Scotia. One morning he said he had stayed up for hours, in the middle of the night, talking to her husband Arnie. Arnie had given him a message: "Tell R. I send perpetual beams of love to her." Arnie left for other realms over two years ago - and his presence is very strong and one of love. R. said: "I can’t imagine Arnie saying anything so poetic. I asked my friend if he was sure it was Arnie" and she laughed. Then she added: "I was very touched."
Carolyn called and left a message. She was sorry to hear about my mom: "I think I already had a visitation" ...
I am sure that she has ...
Monday, November 20
Dear Gail called. She and Jill have been with Ed since yesterday afternoon. The funeral and Memorial Service is planned for next Sunday. Another trip to Westfield, this time my mother’s presence with us in the car.
