Monday, May 21, 2007, 10:08 a.m., D.S.T.~

Dear Susie~

I was sorry to learn that you are in the hospital. I certainly hope that you are feeling better; you are in our prayers.

Honey, I wish there was something I could do to take away some of the pain you are experiencing. You certainly are loved, not only by your immediate family, but your friends. Your friend, Rebekkah Rachel, is beside herself with worry: she cries every night when she goes to bed. We cry for you because you have proven to be a wonderful friend to my own children, and we all think highly of you.

No child deserves to go through all the stress you've had to endure, but if you are feeling stressed, please don't hesitate to talk to someone you trust: you parents, your teachers, your doctors, your pastor, even your closest friends (like Rebekkah Rachel). That's what they're there for: to help you through this time of uncertainty.

Chere', I know it's hard to talk about your past, but chere', you can't keep it bottled up inside. It isn't healthy; you're only going to end up getting sick, more than what you already are. That isn't going to be good for you or your family; it's only going to make things worse.

Bringing your problems out into the open doesn't make you weak or a bad person. Everyone has problems, not just yourself. It's just that some people's problems are bigger than most. Acknowledging that you need help shows you are willing to take that important first step: doing something about it.

No, chere', it isn't easy, not by a long shot. Yet if you want to move on, you'll have to take action. There's no two ways about it. In the end, it will be worth it. You've got to trust me on this.

Chere', some of my own children have been the victims of sexual abuse, physical/emotional abuse, or rape; some of the things they have endured  is shocking; they got the help they needed, and most are now happy, well-adjusted kids (for the most part). Overcoming the past isn't easy, but with the right people, the right therapy, the right "connections", it CAN be done, successfully. Sure, it may be hard for a little while, but people eventually learn to move forward with their lives.

Suicide isn't the answer. Once you do it, you can't come back. You will only end up hurting the ones who love you most, and I don't think you want to do that. Once you do it, you can't come back. I have lost several friends to suicide, and nearly lost my father and some of my kids to suicide attempts, but God intervened, and now my father and kids are healthy and happy. It hurts, and it hurts deep. One really never gets over it, and I have seen what suicide has done to families or friends. It isn't pretty, and it is something I wouldn't recommend. Suicide is ugly, and it isn't the way to get problems solved.

Too many people have taken the "easy way out" by killing themselves (or others); and it isn't going to solve anything. If anything, it is only going to make things worse for those who are left behind because they are going to wonder if there was anything they could have done to prevent the person from killing herself/himself (or others), and they are going to feel guilty, responsible, and are going to be left asking difficult questions, among them, "WHY??"

I have wanted to do this very thing myself, but I have too much living to do, and now that I have God in my life, He has shown me how far I have come, and I realize now just how blessed I really am. Someday you will see this for yourself, and you will realize just how fortunate you really are. You have a lot of living to do, and you are worthy to all who love or care about you. You are valued, and you are loved by your family, your friends, even God, who is always by your side. 

God will never, ever leave you; He will always be with you. From hurting times to happy times, God is right there; He is as close to you as your right hand. He is ready to love you, wipe your tears away, hold you in His Everlasting Arms. He hurts when you hurt, He rejoices when you are happy. He doesn't care about your past; He is ready to love you, fully, openly, and unconditionally.

 He is that kind of a God.

Well, Susie, I will let you go. If you want to write back, I'll be waiting. If not, I can understand. Your mind is probably a tangle of conflicting emotions right now. If you want me to back off, I will, but remember this: I love you with all my heart, and if you want to talk, I'll be there. I'm as close as a few streets away (or a few floors away when I am at work); I'll come running to see you. Or I am as close to you as the computer. All you have to do is reach out and let me love you.

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend (and neighbor), Louisiana Sandusky. :( >tears!<