Allie Nichole Soileau continues to recover from the devastating injuries that have changed her life forever. She is tired and frustrated of hospital life; she is more than ready to return home to her beloved Louisiana.
My days continue to be ruled by pain, colored by technicolored hues of the horrors that is war. I'm so drained, so tired; I'm afraid I'm on the verge of an emotional breakdown...
One day is like the rest: therapy, rest, more therapy, measurements for prosthetic legs, Lofstrand crutches; rest, medications, more therapy, meals, then it's quittin' time until the next go around the following day. Then the rigamarole starts allll over again. *siggggggggh*
I am about recovered from my bone infection (thank GOD!!); still have a little left, so my therapy, right now, is not as intense as it was prior to the discovery of the bone spur. Then the infection set in, which has set me back in my recovery all the more. Very frustrating! Once the infection clears, then the therapy will resume hot and heavy; I'll probably end up being more exhausted than I am right now.
As you can gues by now, this is Allie Nichole Soileau. I wish I could say I was doing better, but as you can see by the above, I'm not, no, not really. It seems as soon as I take a giant leap forward in my recovery, I'm then set back to square one; I then have to fight like hell, fight twice as hard, to get back to where I once was. Extremely upsetting!
My folks came up from Louisiana to see me over the past weekend; we had a wonderful visit; was great seeing 'em again! They brought me some Cajun down-home cookin' (ate it all, too, in two days...*BURRRRP*), brought me some new Cajun music compact discs to listen to on my IPOD! Better'n the elevator music crap they play in the rooms, day in and day out, here at the facility! *GAD!* If I hear one more song by Tony Bennett or Lawrence Welk, I may end up gakking all over!
My little nurse friend, Louisiana Sandusky, from Nashville Memorial Hospital is back at her normal job; she's done working here for the month. She'll be back next month. I already miss her. She gave me copies of two of her books, which are about her large family of adopted children (most with special needs). that way, I can have something to read while trying to pass the time between interruptions. Nice of her to think of me like that! She is quite a gal!
I have started reading her first book, "A Family Made Out Of Rainbows And Miracles: The Sandusky Family Story--A True Story Of Love And International Adoption" (some title, hunh??); it is making for some compeling reading; can't put the book down to save my life! Her family is beautiful, but I don't know if I could handle that many children at one time: my three small nieces Harmony (8), Hayleigh (6), and Hannah (2), are more'n enough whenever they come to visit me!
Hannah, Harmony, and Hayleigh are my sister Amy's kids; she's always dumpin' em on me; she don't watch 'em; they are wild, wild, WILD! Totally out of control! Now she is stuck watchin' em while I am recovering here in the hospital (now rehab center)! At least I'm catchin' a break from those little brats! Let HER deal with 'em for once!
DI Tibbits stopped by, gave me his blessing, told me the Marines ain't the same without me. No kidding. I miss my chums (particularly the ones who died in that bomb blast that changed my life forever; God, how I miss 'em!!), I miss the action; hell, I even miss IRAQ (not the fighting or the insurgency, but the regular, joe-blow Iraq folks, the good ones!). It was nice to see DI Tibbits, but when he left, this tough ol' Marine gal blubbered like a big, fat boob. See? Even MARINES have hearts inside them! We're not as tough as our exteriors make us out to be!
I watch the news every day, to keep tabs on what is going on with our fightin' forces in Iraq. More deaths, more bloodshed, more heartbreak. Don't know why I put myself throught all this; yet I have to stay informed somehow!! I'm getting disgusted with this war; enough is enough!! Bring our boys home; stop the goddamned fighting!!
Goddamn, I'm crying again; gotta' go; can't half see to write from all these shitty tears falling like rain from my eyes...
~Allie Nichole. :( >tears!<
P.S.: One bright spot: I DID get my Purple Heart; at least I now have tangible evidence that I served my country! Now once I get outta' here, I will have to start fightin' to get my veteran's benefits; ain't gonna' be easy, but I am gonna' fight to the end; this Cajun gal ain't givin' up THAT easily!!
Karen, you write about hurt, pain, despair, hope, dreams and happines in an ever ebb and flow that shows what many people must go through in life through varying disabilities. The way you write--putting yourself inside the head and thoughts of your characters--is really wonderfully done. I congratulate you for your fine writings.
Ahhhhhh, this one hurts: the anger, the sadness, the frustration, the having to learn with disability, the having to know that her service may have been in vain, if left up to the government: I hear you. Too many, as Mr. Ed says....God bless 'em.
DI Tibbits stopped by, gave me his blessing, told me the Marines ain't the same without me. No kidding. I miss my chums (particularly the ones who died in that bomb blast that changed my life forever; God, how I miss 'em!!),
A truly heartfelt piece, Karen, and God Bless those like Allie Nichole; there are now far too many of them.
