Auld Queer Goings on in the Western Isles
Nigel was a great success in the Dot Com world but stress was getting him down. He decided with the millions he had made in his work, it was time to retire and lead a more leisurely life.
And so he purchased a But an'' Ben, a modern revampted ancient stone dwelling on the most western point of rural Scotland. He settled happily on the Isle of Lewis and marvelled at his decision. Each day he counted in scores the bobbing heads of seals in the bay, saw the spouting of the whale offshore and marvelled at the aerodynamic movements of the eagle as it flew down from its mountain home.
One evening the telephone rang. It was the Island''s Laird wellcoming him to the island and inviting him to a Ceilidh at his castle.
"Do excuse me, but what is a Ceilidh dear Laird?"
"Ah weel, Nigel. It''s a sort of a dance, Yes a dance with some music around the log fire. And there''s drink, aye I''ve of got every single malt whisky there is to find on the island. And there''s food, oh yes there''s lots of food. There''s grouse and salmon and anything ye want. And there''s sex. Oh yes lots of sex."
Nigel thought for a moment. All the things in life that he was missing. It was too good an opportunity to miss - and at the Laird''s Castle.
"Well, I''d be delighted to come to the Ceilidh. But as I''ve never been to one before, what should I wear? I mean is it formal or not?"
"Oh dinnae bother aboot dressing up", said the Laird. "There''s jist the two of us!"
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Wrong party!!
Love Tinka