Once upon a time there lived a man in a small town with a coned hat that had a jingle bell on top. This hip guy, wherever he went always had a quip to say:
What has 72 teeth and holds back a raging monster? HeHe--a ZIPPER! The screwing you get for the screwing you got is ALIMONY! How the butcher went home after he dropped his cleaver. HALF-COCKED! Which of God's creatures has the shortest sex life? A FROG--he hops on-hops off and then croaks. GUDENTEIT--A virgin in Germany. What does a man catch sometimes when he fishes in another man's pond? The CRABS! What do they call a girl who hasn't met her maker? A MAIDEN! WEDDED BLISS is when your wife has a runny nose, bad breath, a torn dirty nightgown, sloppy hair, and you still kiss her. ATTENTION!! V.D. WARNING!! whore today and gon tomorrow. What's no sooner spread--than done? A QUICKIE! DO YOU KNOW that if the Pilgrims had hunted bob-cats instead of turkeys, we'd all be eating PUSSY for Thanksgiving! OOAAHHH --is the sound of a little bird about 2 inches long that lays a 6 inche square egg. What is it called when you wife-swap with your ex-wife's husband? XWIFEOGMY! What's a thing that you should wash your hands after playing with it? Your YO-YO! What do they call a place where one man's filly can be another man's folly? The KENTUCKY DERBY!
